"Britain's finest resort" - that's what the railway posters used to say. So, like millions before me, I arrive by train. We approach from the southeast, having a brief encounter with a small town, the birthplace, in 1913, of a professional actor (professional debut, Revolt in a Reformatory).
A few minutes later, we arrive at this reinvigorated seaside town. A second actor - first film, You Know What Sailors Are - was born here in 1929. The station, meanwhile, is almost on the sands, so I soon find myself in holiday mood.
Here's the pier, although it's really a jetty, or harbour arm. And just there is where the jetty was. It was really the pier - until it collapsed in 1978. I hope you're still with me.
Walking northeast, I come to a gallery (opened 2011) that celebrates a gentleman's links with the town. He was known latterly as Admiral Booth; the gallery stands on the site of his landlady's guesthouse. The admiral (not his real name) loved the town, saying the skies hereabouts were "the loveliest in all Europe".
Much later, I emerge from the gallery and stroll a little further east to the remains of a seawater lido. In its heyday, it was the place to be in summer, but it is now engulfed by sand. In fact, this resort had two open-air pools, one an enormous 80,000 sq ft. All just a memory. Yet a Phoenix has risen from the ashes: originally 16 acres (and built next to the now gone Hall by the Sea), it is home to a listed structure that has its ups and downs - Britain's only one. So, caterpillars and gallopers, here I come. And fish'n'chips? You betcha!
Who was the first actor?
What is the name of the 'seaside town'?