christening a baby

[bednobs]

i am writing this here cause i'm not brave enough to post in r&s!
My husband would like our daughter christened in our local village church. On investigating the website it says that the godparents must hhave been baptised themselves (which i suppose makes sense) One of the people who we would like as a godparent, and would trust p's moral guidance to has not been christened themselves (and in fact as far as i know doesn't believe in god)
Do you reckon there is any way round this with the church? i want to get ideas before i put it to them.
I realise how ridiculous it sounds, wanting a godparent that doesn't believe in god, but i would like this person to have some sort of status in her life, other than "mum's friend"
Any ideas (that don't involve lambasting me for being hypocritcal)?

[LoftyLottie]

Two of my three Godparents never even took any interest in me after my Christening!!!

[starone]

How do you prove whether you have been christened or not? I know I was, when I could not choose for myself, but I have no proof, only my mother's word. If my mother had not told me, I would not know. Perhaps your friend has been christened and has not been told about it.

[237SJ]

Exactly. I have nothing to say I was christened. I suspect that might be in the church records though.

[craft1948]

My daughter has her christening card..............

[Ann]

I think it does depend on the denomination, some churches are more casual in their rules. I go to a free church but even my minister would expect a Godparent to believe in God, as I think a Godparent is expected to bring the child up in Christian ways and teachings. My very elderly Godmother (sadly now gone) was a staunch old fashioned christian lady, heavily involved in our church.

[LoftyLottie]

But if the friend doesn't even believe in God, would she want to make vows in a Church that express that she does believe and undertake that she will encourage the child to lead a Christian life - surely not. I know a lot of people don't even think about it, but yes, it is hypocritical.

[LoftyLottie]

I still have my Christening card Craft!

[craft1948]

lol Lottie I don't have mine but there would have been no chance of me not being christened. I went to the little church school which was attached to the church.

[naomi24]

Craft, //Naomi going by your last paragraph I'm clearly not............ //

Oh dear. You really should get over yourself - and past the past you know.

Just out of interest, why do you put a line of dots after practically everything you write? Does it mean something in cyberland that I'm not aware of?

[Ann]

I still have a silver spoon engraved with my initials - its 65 soon LOL :)

[Ann]

It denotes a pause for thought Naomi, I love using them myself ........

[naomi24]

So Ann, why were you pausing for thought just then? Hadn't you said all you wanted to say?

[craft1948]

Naomi I can assure you that I have nothing to 'get over'. In one post you say that people in R&S would have been helpful with regards to the OP and in the next post you say. "People addle their children's minds as they see fit. I can't put sense where there is none." which to my mind denegrates the OP.
I'm sorry if my ellipses annoy you............

[LoftyLottie]

My Christening card is over 65 Ann.

I think back then every child was Christened regardless. It was expected. Nowadays people give it more thought. Mr LL and I are not religious but both come from completely different religious cultures. Son is not christened.

[DaisyNonna]

Civil marriages are acceptable. Why not a civil naming ceremony with sponsors? Not a legal binding to bring up the child should the parents die but an acknowledgement to guide the child.

[naomi24]

Craft, your mind is your mind - but rest assured, nothing about you annoys me, so no need to apologise.

[LoftyLottie]

Actually, people mistakenly think that Godparents are there to take the place of parents if necessary.

Daisy, your idea is much like I suggested. An informal occasion which you can arrange yourself which poems and things perhaps to welcome baby into the world.

[daisya]

Good idea Daisy if someone isn't religious then a naming ceremony would be a perfect solution IMO when people want to mark the occasion. I must say if people want a christening in church but don't go to church regularly, then IMO it's hypocritical...after all religion is what a christening is all about.

[sherrardk]

Just wondering, we (me and himself) are not religious but our children go/have been to a c of e school - is that hypocritical? (school in question is the village school).

[Ann]

Actually Lottie I realised my christening spoon is only 60 as I was 5 when my brother (4 and a bit years younger) were both "done" together!" Buy one get one free perhaps??