Apart from a church leader having me in floods of tears by telling the ten year old me that I was responsible for Jesus’ death and that he went through all that pain and suffering for me, I enjoyed my time with the church. However, years after that ten year old sat guilt-ridden and weeping uncontrollably, questions arose that necessitated, to my mind, further investigation, and so setting the church’s teachings aside I examined the residue - and hence reached what I consider to be an incontrovertible conclusion. If a creator God does exist, it’s not the God of the bible - and for anyone who has the wherewithal to check that out, forget everything you've been taught about religion and really - really - read the bible. All the evidence you want is there - well, that's for those who want the evidence.
Incidentally, grudges are self-destructive - which is why I don’t hold them. The clock can’t be turned back and nothing can be changed. Therefore the sensible thing to do is acknowledge that and move on.