Swearing In Front Of Children

[bednobs]

is it the parents job to take the children out of the way if someone is swearing in a public place and they don't want the children to hear, or is it incumbent on the swearers to moderate their language?

[wolf63]

Bit of both.

Adults should attempt to omit swear words when around children.

But if someone's language is unacceptable you can take the kids away from them.

Kids are most likely to know most of the bad words anyway. I swear at the computers, printers and self scanning tills.

[andy-hughes]

Difficult.

The swearer would argue that free speech allows them to speak as they wish.

But as we know, free speech does not entitle you falsely to shout 'Fire!' in a crowded theatre.

With free speech comes responsibility, and I believe we should be mindful of our behaviours, and how they impact on those around us. Such courtesies smooth the way the world turns.

Sadly, the sort of person who swears in public loudly enough to cause parental concern, is not the sort of person likely to respond in a favourable fashion to a lesson in civics from an adjacent stranger.

Discretion being the better part of valour, I would, if possible, move my child out of earshot, lest even worse swearing at even greater volume be the result of trying to instil a degree of decorum into someone already keen to demonstrate their lack of it to anyone within earshot.

[Zacs-Master]

It’s a bit naive. Children are going to hear swearing and parrot it fairly early in their development. It’s a bit like trying to keep them away from oxygen.

[andy-hughes]

Zacs - Simply saying 'Children hear it anyway ...' is not, in my view, an approach that helps.

I taught my children that language and behaviour varies with circumstances, and part of growing up is learning the appropriate settings for different language and behaviour.

I would point out that working with telephone engineers, I have already forgotten more swear words than they will know, but they will never hear those words come out of my mouth when speaking to them, or their mum, or any family or friends, and I don't expect to hear it from them either.

It's about time and place, and people being aware of what is and what is not acceptable in present company.

So I never thought 'They'll hear it at school anyway...' which of course they did. I tried to point out the sense of surrounding that makes language appropriate, or not, and to use it accordingly.

[wolf63]

AH, this is meant kindly...

Are you always so serious and analytical? Don't you feel like making up life's rules as you go along?

[Zacs-Master]

That’s straying from the OP somewhat though, Andy. As you can hopefully tell from my postings on here, my command of English is fairly comprehensive. I was brought up in an environment where swearing was fairly normal, especially when the construction workers arrived to build the M62 virtually outside my parent’s house! Yet I don’t seem to have suffered any irreparable damage.

What fears did you have about your children being exposed to swearing?

[andy-hughes]

Wolf - No, not at all, I reserve that side of my nature for debating on here. I tend to think and analyse when alone, which is when I discuss things on here.

The rest of the time, I find a faint smile and acceptance of the vagaries of humanity get me through the day.

[andy-hughes]

Zacs, I had no fears whatsoever about my daughter's being exposed to swearing, or anything else life would, and does throw at them.

As grown women, I know that they have an extensive and graphic vocabulary, they all have strong characters and opinions.

But they don't swear in conversation with me,and I don't swear talking to them.

I don't think it's harmful, just ugly, and I love my children too much to want ugliness between us.

[wolf63]

AH
That's good, I had visions of you driving Mrs H nuts and her sticking an axe through your skull.

[Rosetta]

My command of English is also fairly comprehensive but I am of a generation where swearing as a matter of common usage was generally socially unacceptable. There are still certain words I would never ever use and I dont see why others have the right to inflict them on me.
Some words are rarely used with the agreement of most, I am thinking of the "n---" word.

[Zacs-Master]

Me too. And several other people.

[Zacs-Master]

The ‘N’ word isn’t swearing.

[nailedit]

What constitutes a swear word?

[Rosetta]

I would consider the "n---" word to be swearing and the swear filter on here would most definitely filter it out

[Zacs-Master]

Go on then, give an example of a sentence where the N word is swearing.

[andy-hughes]

Thanks wolf.

I can assure you, Mrs Hughes and I spend varying amounts, but always some part of every day, laughing fit to bust at the sheer nonsense that surrounds us everywhere.

I think a robust sense of humour, a tolerance of the absurd, and a lot of love, are ingredients for a happy life.

Oh, and coming on gere to exchange information and opinions of course.

[Rosetta]

Swearing is not just expletives when you bang your thumb with a hammer, it can be what you call people either as an adjective or a noun

[andy-hughes]

Rosetta - Me too.

I remember being fascinated as a sixth former, when someone brought a copy of Henry Miller's Tropic Of Cancer in, because it had the 'f' word in it, and none of us had ever seen the word in print before.

Swearing was far more of a social taboo then than now, but we tend to remember what we grow up with more than what we accept as the norm as adults.

[Zacs-Master]

I disagree. A swear word is an expletive used to exaggerate or emphasis a point or statement which you are trying to make. I can’t think of a single example of where the N word could be used in that way. It’s simply a derogatory racial slur.

[Cloverjo]

I’d rather people didn’t use the f or c words in front of children, or in public at all really. If they did in front of my child when he was little I’d ignore it and hope the swearer would shut up soon.

If the swearer was someone I knew I’d try to shush him up.