Old People

[scotchollie]

Why do old people always, always pay with handfuls of loose change when they get to the head of the queue in supermarkets?

It takes them ages to count it out, what with their shaking hands and poor eyesight.

And their inane banter about the price of eggs and how cold it is today slows things further still...

Honestly, can't they pay with a note and speed things up, or should we have a dedicated aisle in supermarkets for old people?

Discuss.

[cascarelli]

Oh no, where are we going to sit now???

[scotchollie]

Sit on Bejaysus.

Now he's been fed, he won't be quite so aggressive.

Just do not, repeat, do not, let him near the beer.

[cascarelli]

Yeah, then you'll blame me for the smell

[crete]

scot, just a thought but might you have a horse , but you think it is a dog ?

[scotchollie]

No, he's a dog.

Used to think he was a horse, and entered him into a race.

He led from start to finish, before stopping at the last fence to **** his leg.

Needless to say, he was overtaken by the rest of the pack and I lost a fortune.

A word of warning about the beer:

The last time Bejaysus got drunk was when he met Joan Collins.

The result was Chewbacca, from the Star Wars film.

[cascarelli]

Takes after his mother then?

[scotchollie]

Bejaysus, no.

Chewbacca, yes.

[joko]

personally i can't wait until i am codger so i can delight in annoying the hell out of all the young whippersnappers!!

even now i practice my 'muddling up the fiddly coins' ha ha!

[bigmamma]

Hi there
Tea and biscuits at peppys , dogs. and muddling small change !!!!!!
Overuse of xxxxx !!!!!!!!! WWWWWW
Sounds right up my street , can I join in ?

[peppy]

Can someone come and let me out please, the bathroom doors jammed.
















Hello, anybody there ???

[bigmamma]

It's not jammed peppy
Bejaysus is asleep against the other side of it !!!!

[scotchollie]

For God's sake don't wake him.

Remember what happened the last time?

[bigmamma]

Indeed I do !!!!!
We better leave him til he wakes and wants out to do his bits.
Have you got a window you can climb out of or are you going to sit this one out ?

[peppy]

Well that's me eyebrows plucked, toenails cut,armpits sorted and the less said about me bikini line the better.

If you've all been and gone, best I can hope for is that you've washed up.
Hope me new settee's not come to grief, it's still on HP.
P.S, Who's gonna invite me round theirs, it's only fair !

[Baby Jane]

every one at mine ok Bring farting dogs,teabags,biccies, razor so peppy can do her bikini line and lets have a hell of a AB party. looking forward to meeting you scotchollie and you too katie, in fact all of you.
xx

[scotchollie]

I'm here, but can't find Bejaysus for love nor money.

Last time this happened was during Crufts1985 and I'm still paying off the damages.

[Katie~77]

Hellooooooooooooo. Any sign of Bejaysus yet???x

[scotchollie]

No sign of him Kate.

I'm getting worried now that he's gone on the run or fallen into bad company.

And if he's started drinking again, then may God help us...

[Baby Jane]

Bejaysus has just walked in, drunk and disorderly singing a chorus of "Hound Dog" shall I send him home with a flea in his ear ( tee hee) and he has a female with him , yuk she's a right dog
Let me know when he is home.
xx

[scotchollie]

Baby Jane, thanks for the information and apologise if the beast has been hounding you for more alcohol.

Please lock up your children, booze, cigarettes and medicine cabinet and let Bejaysus sleep it off in the garden.

You might want to warn the neighbours too and I suggest that everyone closes their blinds.

I can only hope that he has not tracked down his puppy love, 'Priscilla' who led him astray at a very young age.

Just be careful how you handle her - she can be a right little b!tch.