If there was a God

[stevie1time]

I would beat the living daylights out of the sick twisted B@*�ard............he has obviously got issues to put us through this ****!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

[stevie1time]

We all suffer loss,more so the loss of of a life that has not even truly begun,my family lost,my nephew was only 5 years old when a car hit him in the face at 40mph,and we had to turn the machines off,he had spent all day in church with my father,his grandfather...Yet that ****** up there thought ahh who gives a **** i'l take him!!!! I have no love lost for the ponce,but that dont mean i dont think he does not exsist...

[hau kola]

We had to make the same decision when my brother had his motorbike accident.

[stevie1time]

Theres no comfort in the answer that everything happens for a reason hau kola,all we can do is ponder what could we have done to make these things not happen...Religous people will say that they happened as retribution for our sins....I have honestly come to the conclusion as a i consider 35 year old grown man,a father and son,,,that this worlsd is what you make it...i close my eyes and breath a deep sigh to all the sadness and suffering in the world,,knowing that little old me cant make a difference..............

[hau kola]

You are a good man Stevie-my best wishes to you and your family.xx

[stevie1time]

To you too fine sir...rejoice in what we do have...because for sure there is someone round the corner who has by far less....

[hau kola]

Thanks,but last time i looked,i was a fine lady.

[stevie1time]

Sorry :)

[hau kola]

Granted.x

[stevie1time]

Much appreciated,,you start to tend to think that the only folk who would be up now,would be not so much miserable but an axe to grind bloke XXX Ok Hau kola,since you are a fine lady can i ask you a question that is completely not of this subject,but my weekend so far, a ladies opinion would be good???

[hau kola]

Go for it

[stevie1time]

Ive been living on my own for two years now,i have my kids every weekend and as often in other times work permiting,i choose to be single,because my time is for my kids and work...I was with my kids mother Helen,for 11 years,i cant say i was the greatest bloke to be around,but hey who is? She got married yesterday,probably the best day of her life,my kids probably had a great day with their new legal family....I have a great circle of friends whoi asked me to go out clubbing,pubs etc,but i chose to stay in..I dont love her anymore and i havent for a long time..so why do i feel so sad about it all....i put it down to thinking that yes she is happy she deserves it...but yet heres me sat on me tod....i cant get my head round it...what you reckon????

[hau kola]

I reckon you should have gone clubbing-how old are you?

[stevie1time]

I thought about it,but f@&k it, i am 35

[hau kola]

Not to old to go clubbing then.You need to get on with your life the same as your ex has done,I admire your committment to your kids.My ex used to see our daughter everyother weekend though it seemed like it was just a chore to him.She has come to realize this and wont see him anymore.She sent him a birthday card in April and he didnt even pick the phone up to say thanks.Like i say,start living for you,youve got your kids,thats a blessing.You`ll meet someone when you least expect it and you need to keep in with your mates for support.

[stevie1time]

I get what your saying,but the worst part about it,is that i cant envision the future with someone,you get into a set way and not a rut,but just aset way,my kids are more than enough for me,she goes on her honeymoon tommorow and i have the kids for the week with me....I aint a weak person,i am 6ft2 and strong willed stand out from the crowd bloke,,,but summats missing !!!!

[hau kola]

You`ll find it.It doesnt have to be a relationship-just friendship.Im off to my bed now,very tired.Goodnight,take care.xxxx

[stevie1time]

Goodnight and take care,thanks for the advice :)

[naomi24]

Stevie, can I just say that nothing stays the same. Life changes constantly, and none of us know what the future holds. I can truly empathise with your feelings. I've been divorced and had my down times - plenty of them - but down times don't last forever, believe me. Sometimes it's difficult to remain optimistic, but if you can try to see your glass as half full, rather than half empty, and concentrate on the good things in life, you'll find it easier to move on, and then you'll find that life will improve. It's early days for you at the moment, but moving on really is the only way forward. You seem like a caring man, and one of these days, right out of the blue, someone will come along who will be right for you and although you won't forget the past, you'll learn to put it into context and accept it as an episode in your life..

Good luck Stevie - and try to keep positive. x.

[stevie1time]

Thanks Naomi, i am just getting myself geared up for the kids, youngest is 6 eldest is 14 and all they do is bicker and fight,they have never stayed here for more than 3 days,they are here for seven...I would say God help me,but i think he knows i'l beat him up when i see him :) X

[mibn2cweus]

Presented with these three alternatives:

1. Attempt to subvert the reality of others as a lying politician . . .
2. Subvert my own reality by believing in a non-existent God . . .
3. Risk being hit by a car or burning forever in hell while fleeing from the possibility of succumbing to alternative 1 or 2 . . .

I know which alternative I would choose. Having done so I count my blessings that I have not been run over by any of the three while my heart goes out to those who having made the honourable choice have not been so fortunate. However, I do not feel compelled to shed a tear for those who having chosen alternative 1 or 2 have forfeited the capacity to share the love of existence experienced by those who have made the only rational choice.

Thanks for sharing your story with those of us who understand, appreciate and possess what it is you are missing and with those who may yet learn from it.