I`m ba ack

[claymore]

If you could come back as whoever you liked who would you choose?

[naomi24]

As you've posted this in R&S, I'll answer in that vein. Probably Mary Magdalene - and then I'd know what Jesus really said - and what he was really all about. And then I could come on here and prove to the Christians they have it all wrong.

[Oakleaf51]

Norman Wisdom. He was never miserable.

[squarebear]

Beyonce Knowles's knickers. :o)

[Octavius]

God. And then I would strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger (etc etc) on those who ever doutbted I was real. Then I would put the world right, make everybody happy, accept blame for everything that has happened before, promise never to do it again and let everyone live long and prosper. Except Kerry Katona and Sharon Osbourne. I have some fork lightning I prepared earlier set by just for them. Then everyone can be marvelled at my great work and worship me for ever more.

[chakka35]

naomi, I was about to warn you off your choice on the grounds that you might come back and discover that Mary of Magdala never existed and you'd find yourself in Fictionland.
Then I realised that it could be absolutely wonderful to find yourself in such a place for eternity. Gosh, you could...

...make love as often as you like to James Bond and Flashman and call on Superman to get you out of tight spots; help Sherlock with his reasoning; save Desdemona's life by telling Othello that Iago was lying; take the train to Market Blandings to spend a weekend with those wonderful Wodehouse characters; warn Romeo not to drink the poison because Juliet wasn't dead;
tell Winston Smith that 1984 won't really be like that.... the opportunities are endless.

Oh, and there's a 50/50 chance that you'd meet Jesus in Fictionland ... and certainly God!

[Octavius]

That�s alright then, I�m sure Naomi and I could think of something to do in the afterlife. If as you put it there are so many others, it could be quite a party.

[chakka35]

Pay attention, Octavius. I wasn't talking about the afterlife, but Fictionland. Is that where you are?

[Octavius]

If there's a party, its usually where I'm at.

[commonsense]

Chakka35 why did Mary Magdelene not exist? Im baffled I have studied her for over 8 years and I find this a shock that somebody says this. Enlighten me

[naomi24]

Chakka Wow! After reading that I realise the possibilities are far greater than I'd ever envisaged! There's no doubt I made the right choice - and I'm raring to go!!

[naomi24]

Octavius I really don't mind where the party is - just pour the drinks!

[Octavius]

Well being God an�all, I�d be omnipresent wouldn�t I, so I�d make sure I was at all the best parties wherever they were, even if that involved getting the odd round in, so drinks on me providing we start with the altar wine.

Obviously I�d have to stagger back to heaven once in a while with a couple of angels on each arm - you know to check my emails, balance the books on sins and confessions, check the world is at perace and send another sparkly bolt or two towards the Osbourne.

[chakka35]

commonsense, I didn't actually say that Mary Magdalene (MM) didn't exist but that she might not have existed, and it would be very odd to come back as a phantom.

The problem is that MM occurs only in the gospels and we have no way of knowing how reliable they are. They were written years after the event, in the last third of the 1st century AD, by unknown people who weren't there and who had no previous material to work from; we can find no
accounts by any eye-witnesses nor anything written during Jesus' supposed times.
Because we don't know who the gospel writers were we have no idea whether they were truth-tellers or liars, historians or fantasists.
I personally wouldn't bet more than fourpence that the very minor character, MM, existed and am surprised that you can have spent 8 years studying her.
Have you found references to her by a recognised, named historian then?

(Sorry that this has suddenly got serious, folks, but 'commonsense' did ask!)

[Pippa68]

I would come back as Victoria Beckham.

What could be wrong with having her life? I would stuff my face with cakes and get to sleep with David.

Pure bliss.

[4GS]

I'd come back as the AB Ed and get those lazy good for nothing techies working on this magnificent forum in double quick time and work tirelessly on making Answerbank the number one, bestst site in all the world.

And in my spare time worship God/Octavius

[Octavius]

Bless you my son.

[Octavius]

Pippa, wouldn�t you have to assume that someone else has come back as DB, otherwise he might be in his 90�s by then so sleeping with him might involve a few trips in the night to empty his colostomy bag?

[4GS]

Thank you Father

[Octavius]

No worries, I do that for anyone who sneezes, even the unenlightened.

[Pippa68]

Of course, Oct.

I am sure someone would pick DB. Hopefully Simon Le Bon, or Reverandfunk.