Can I tell my child there's no God?

[styley]

I was brought up as a catholic but realised long ago that this religion lark is all b/s. The problem is I live in a very catholic and a bit protestant society. So, I've got a 4 year old son who I feel has no notion of religion but who must go to school this year, run by the catholic church. Also I'm going to get married in the next few years in a catholic ceremony. I love both people involved but am going to feel like a lier as I won't believe truly any vow(to the church) that I make. Obviously I will not say anything about my true beliefs to protect my family, but I don't think such a force should have such a hold over my life.

[annie0000]

NJ - I dont see why doing something that pleases your partner but that you personally don't believe in does any harm whatsoever, as long as she know that you dont believe in it. Why is that not respecting yourself or others or differences. You can't commit a sin against something you son't believe in. I don't believe in Santa or the easter bunny or the tooth fairy for that matter, but that doesn't stop me from going along with it to please my children - I am not exactly not being true to myself.

Lying to have a catholic ceremony isn't respectful - to who exactly? I have already said that he needs to be honest with his future wife.

You know what, I have no problem with not believing in God, I don't feel the need to convert everyone who doesn't, I don't have a superior attitude to those who do - this is the opposite of most practicing christians that I encounter.

Is the fact that you are going to heaven and we poor sinners are all going to hell that gives you that attitude?

You know what, don't even bother to answer because quite frankly, I couldn't give a toss. As far as I understand it styley was looking for some measured advice. I don't think you quite get the point that you cant defile or sin or break a vow to something that you actually don't believe in in the first place.

[naomi24]

NJ There are non-denominational religious ceremonies that involve no deception on Styley's part.

Fine, but what if that option doesn't suit his fiancee? What if she feels a desperate need to be married in her own church?

And incidentally, you guess wrong.

[NJGirl]

"You know what, don't even bother to answer because quite frankly, I couldn't give a toss."

I don't need your permission to either answer or not answer. And if you truly "didn't give a toss", why did you reply to begin with?

"You can't commit a sin against something you son't believe in. "

It's not about "sin". It's about starting off one's marriage with the underlying "I don't really mean it" and deception.

"You know what, I have no problem with not believing in God"

Neither do I. What I have a problem with is people being disrespectful to another religion; i.e. accepting a Sacrament that they don't believe in and lying to others about it AND in order to obtain it

"... this is the opposite of most practicing christians that I encounter. "

You need to find some other Christians to encounter.

"I don't believe in Santa or the easter bunny or the tooth fairy for that matter, but that doesn't stop me from going along with it to please my children - I am not exactly not being true to myself. "

So .... you are saying that you can't tell the difference between having a bit of fun with kids and their imagination by passing down a myth from lying in order to accept a Sacrament and making or taking a vow that you don't believe in?

"Lying to have a catholic ceremony isn't respectful - to who exactly?"

I believe you mean DIS-respectful. To the church, to the Priest who agreed to marry them and to all those in attendance who are there in part because they believe he means what he is doing.

"Why is that not respecting yourself or others or differences. "

See above. Do you know the definition of dishonest?

[NJGirl]

"I don't think you quite get the point that you cant defile or sin or break a vow to something that you actually don't believe in in the first place. "

You can't be serious. Let me put another way. If I wiped my butt with the Koran or the Torah, would it make it any less disrespectful because they do not represent my personal beliefs or if no one knew about it? Of course not.

"Is the fact that you are going to heaven and we poor sinners are all going to hell that gives you that attitude?"

Did God tell you that? Are you stating it as a "fact" because you are in charge of admittance? If not, how do you know this for a "fact"? Cite please.

"As far as I understand it styley was looking for some measured advice."

And what he got was mostly a steady stream of people telling him that it's ok to be dishonest and disrespectful because it's not his belief structure.

[NJGirl]

naomi,

Well good for you for making a go out of a marriage without compromise.

[naomi24]

NJ Sorry you're so wound up, but I have to say I'm not quite sure what you mean. You have no idea whether I've made compromises or not, and apart from that what has my marriage to do with the dilemma styley finds himself in?

I asked what your solution would be if styley's fiancee feels a desperate need to be married in her own church? I suppose it boils down to a very simple question, but one with no simple answer. How can each be true to themselves?

[Ethmer]

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"Can I tell my child there's no God?"

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Yes, but you would be better off telling the child, as the child ages, that there are many people who believe in God(s) just as there are many who don't believe in a God. The child will be exposed to various beliefs from peers, so it behooves you to have answers ready, both pro and con, so the child will realize that it's all about individual choice.

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"Do you believe in God?"

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i am a Deist! (One who believes in the existence of a God, but denies revealed religion; a freethinker.)

de�ism (de'iz'?m, da'-)
n.

The belief, based solely on reason, in a God who created the universe and then abandoned it, assuming no control over life, exerting no influence on natural phenomena, and giving no supernatural revelation.
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"Do you believe in the Bible?"

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No!

In contrast to believing in the Bible, i believe:

1. That God is that Creative/Causative Force that exists before the beginning of the universe/time and continues to exist outside of the universe and time.

2. That "Force" created/caused the spiritual/soul entities to come into being.

3. The spiritual/soul entities continued the "Creation" with the "Big Bang". And, through evolution and possibly subtle manipulations, have caused the current state of affairs.

4. The spirits/souls choose to inhabit the various physical bodies that they have created in order to experience physical reality.

5. When bodies die the spirit/soul continues to exist and often times reincarnates into another body in order to continue its growth.

6. The purpose of it all is for the spirits/souls (entities) to gain knowledge and experience and to ultimately rejoin or evolve back into the Oneness of God.

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