Crosswords2 mins ago
The Rectum Stretcher!
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A woman driving along at speed, passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk & asked, 'And what's your hurry?'
She replied, 'I'm late for work.'
'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'
'I'm a Rectum Stretcher,' she responded.
The cop stammered, 'A what?
'A Rectum Stretcher!'
'And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'
'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger in the rectum, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet'
'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot ***?' he asked
'You give him a radar gun & park him behind a bridge...'
A woman driving along at speed, passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk & asked, 'And what's your hurry?'
She replied, 'I'm late for work.'
'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'
'I'm a Rectum Stretcher,' she responded.
The cop stammered, 'A what?
'A Rectum Stretcher!'
'And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'
'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger in the rectum, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet'
'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot ***?' he asked
'You give him a radar gun & park him behind a bridge...'
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Lol. That is like the little old lady who got stopped for speeding, got out of the car and put her hands up. Why have you got your hands up says the cop. Because I thought you knew about the bodies and machine gun in the boot says little old lady. Cop goes into panic mode and calls for armed assistance which duly arrives in a fanfare of sirens and screeching tyres. Cop tells the armed squad what old lady has in the boot and they gingerly open it. Empty! What's this they say to little old lady, our colleague told us you had bodies and a machine gun in here. The lying stabrad she says I bet he tells you I was speeding when he made me stop next.