Mugwump

[Fatoomfsh]

I have a mugwump that lives under my bed and as a result i have to have my bed near the light switch so that i can jump onto my bed as the lights go out. Anyone else have this problem?

[lizaixi]

Many moons ago I used to have Something under the bed - and it would steal my thumbs if I didn't hide them in the palms of my hands - but I never knew it was a mugwump, thanks Fatoomfsh for that bit of info. According to my aged mater, the vast quantities of cut-up paper (I used to have a scissor fetish) drowned the little b****r and it's never been seen again in over 50 years. At least that's wot I was told - maybe it's the one now living under your bed Fatoomfsh - sorry if it is!!! Try the cut-up paper thinggy - it may even work.

[tinkertontom]

why dont you read it a really really scary story it will be so frightend it won't come out from under your bed, and then in the morning you could suck the poor terified mugwump up wlth the vac and then chuck it in the dustbin to be taken away to be thrown onto the dump were it can live the rest of its life with all the other mugwumps that have been chucked there

[pedantic]

That Dobby the house-elf keeps turning up in my bedroom. He's destroyed 3 bedside lamps and has ruined my wardrobe door with his constant self-punishment. I am very careful not to give him any clothes as I don't want him here permanently.

[Aprilis]

Build a trap for it using jam sandwiches (or small child) as bait. Fill the bottom of said trap with slaked lime and as it settles down to feast on the bait....hey presto....problem (dis)solved.

[Darrenlass77]

I never thought of trying to vacuum it up - am I too kind to mugwumps then ? Are you allowed to use small children as bait these days ? I did once try to use the cats for that purpose but they were distinctly unimpressed.

[country_boy]

Do mugwumps still excrete 2 different narcotics out of the tubes protuding from their heads or have they evolved since Naked Lunch?

[Makinamess]

Two tubes protuding from their head ? Gawd, I thought it was an addictive fluid secreted from their "interested" member which prolonged life by slowing down metabolism, hee hee.