Awful Christmas Jokes

[weecalf]

The punnier the better
I bought a box of 6 pies ,it said on the box best ever I was not conminced they were .

[DTCwordfan]

How will Christmas dinner be different after Brexit?

No Brussels. Though that may be because May has got us Bananas Foster as of this evening.

[DTCwordfan]

I can't get to the chocolates in my advent calendar. Effing foiled again.

[Tilly2]

Hold on, I'll just pull a couple of crackers...

[weecalf]

Two guys sitting in a bar every night playing board game. they were chess nuts

[DTCwordfan]

What do they sing at minty's and emmie's birthday party?
Freezshes a jolly good ABer.....

[weecalf]

Things you never hear said at Christmas ..Santa comes home and says to the wife. “Was there any post for me “

[Chipchopper]

Santa At The Doctors.
Dr: What seems to be the problem ?.
Santa, "I have a mince pie stuck up my butt"
Dr: Don't worry, I have some cream for that.

[DTCwordfan]

in Yorkshire, he would say, I got some nice aarrs cream for t'at.

[Voltage]

Why does Santa have three gardens?

So he can 'ho ho ho'!

[Chipchopper]

What did the bald man say when he opened his Christmas present and found a comb inside.

Oh what a lovely, thoughtful gift.
I don't think I will ever part with it.

[marval]

What kind of motorcycle would Santa ride?
A Holly Davidson

[Baldric]

What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

"It's Christmas Eve"

[Baldric]

How do you recognise a Christmas tree from BHS?

All the branches have gone.

[Bazile]

lol - i see most of you have come up with the same results , from your google search

[marval]

What did the reindeer say before beginning his comedy routine?
This will sleigh you.