I don't like them...and the closer I am to the dead person the less I like them. In my work, I met with lots of older people who were in some kind of permanent care with a spouse elsewhere. When one or the other died, it was received wisdom that the survivor had to go to the funeral for closure. Mostly the survivor was too numb/unwell/demented to refuse but more often than not, I didn't see it do much good. A couple of times, the survivor was in a position to refuse point blank and the angst and distress it caused among the staff involved was of heroic proportions. As an occupational Therapist, it was my job (and personal inclination) to advocate for the bereaved person and it didn't make me popular....tant pis!