How Life Can Change Over Time

[Baldric]

Regulars will know that over the last 12 months or so Mrs B. has had Health problems.
We met in late 1984 married in 1987, never looked back.
In July last year Mrs B, Kate, had a 'Blackout' was taken into A&E due to Tachycardia and a certain amount of confusion, was there for 3 days, but no diagnosis.
This happened twice more in next 2 months, during the second of those episodes she 'fitted' while waiting for the Ambulance and again in the Ambulance Bay at the Hospital.
Another 3-4 days inpatient care, this time a tentative "It could be Late Onset Epilepsy"
About 3 weeks later one evening she stood up to go to bed, then bent down to pick her blanket up off the floor, before I could stop her she bent forwards, overbalanced, banged her head on coffee table and off to A&E again for 4 days this time. There was no blanket to be picked up only in her mind.
When we visited she wanted to know why we were covered in orange spots and could we please stop those two horrible men shouting, it was an all Female Ward, no men except well behaved visitors.
During those 4 days we received some very strange 'phone calls from her saying she was at a Hotel in Norwich, or she was on a Flight to Belgium, and also some quite rational ones talking about Family, Dogs etc.
She has been Episode free since last October, which is good, however her balance is very shakey, she cannot walk very well, suffers short term memory loss, gets the shakes a lot and is dilusional at times.
Is having lots of Tests, Examinations etc.
Obviously has surrendered her Driving Licience.
I have spent the last 13 months basically looking after a Woman I no longer know, she has changed so much, does not alter what I feel for her but it is bloody hard work, we just get on with it, and do what has to be done.
I have not written this because I feel sorry for myself because I don't, I'm not that sort of person.
I guess if there's anything I want to say it is 'Just cherish what you have 'cause you never know what's around the next corner

[Baldric]

Marvel, Nailit and Fbg, thank you.

[rowanwitch]

Been out so only just picked up on this. Really sorry to hear what you have been going through, I know when you love someone you sign on for whatever comes but we all hope it won't happen. I am glad you have good support, and I hope you will have a proper diagnosis soon. It is so different when the enemy has a name and you know then if anything can be done. I knew that Dave and I wouldn't have long so we cherished every silly precious minute. From our first mugs of tea together in the morning to the last gentle touch at night. I hope they can find a way to bring her back to you, that it is something that can be treated or at least reversed for a while. Anyway I will be thinking of you, take care of yourself

Rowan

[Baldric]

Rowan, Thank you, nice post.

[david small]

Baldric. Just read your post after having an argument with my better half. Usually I fume for a while, then look up flats to rent in the outer Hebrides. This time I’ve mulled over what I take for granted that could so easily turn to mush. We still love and have each other. You do what you do because you love her and it must be done. I wish you and Kate answers to this long endured torment. Never despair.

[Baldric]

David,
Thank you, from your post the other day I gather we have a similar background, my attitude is quite simple, Do what needs to be done,

[tamborine]

A painful & emotional trial for you and your Kate. I hope there is light soon from your dark tunnel. We only have our love, will and hopes for recovery of those we tend. I wish your wife well soon.

[Togo]

I saw this pass through latest posts earlier Baldric.....and gulped. Your reminder to be grateful for what we have, in your circumstance, was humbling. I can now, after a bit of a busy day, take a moment to offer my admiration of your fortitude and relief that you have a close team to bolster your dedication and concern. My partner and I, both 70 years old, realistically discuss such scenarios but both know that our commitment and love will override any flippant "make it easy on yourself" resolutions. All that I can add is that if it was not me to care for my partner, then I would choose you. I sincerely hope that Kate can become well again, for herself mostly, but for you also. It doesn't seem 2 minutes ago that you were sorting out your new home and that she was looking forward to retiring after spending years involved with looking after other poorly people.

[Zacs-Master]

Oh, Balders, I really feel for you. That can’t have been easy to post. Mrs Zacs had a bit of a scare 18 months ago so we’re familiar with your last sentence. I hope things get a bit easier, pal.

[Baldric]

Tambo,
Thank you.
Togo,
Thank you so much for that.
Zacs,
Spot on, was not at all easy, we'll just plod-on giving it our best shot

[Baldric]

Although they've not posted here I would like to publicly say a great big thank you to Tash and her colleague Nat who are really being a tremendous help.
"Thanks Girls" . . . I owe you.

[wolf63]

It's good that you have friends like Tash and Nat. Friends are easy to make but good friends are family. x

[Baldric]

Those two have both been adoptive family. so much part of the overall plan, I luv 'em both lots.

[Peter Pedant]

I am sorry this has occurred

[Theland]

Very sorry for you both Baldric.
You must be very mentally and physically tired.
If you don't mind I shall pray for you that you have the strength to get through. Best wishes.

[Baldric]

Thanks Peter P
Theland, prayers are welcomed