Feeling Hopeless Tonight

[silliemillie]

My hospital tests were not good news, my Myeloma is back with a vengeance and I will have to have chemo in the next few weeks or so.

I could cope with this, I've done it before, but with my current domestic situation I'm just feeling like everything is hopeless.

As many of you know, I am now caring for my Mum who's almost 82. But theres nothing wrong with her now! She had that fall in December but wil now not let me leave the house without her, she point blank refuses to be left alone.

How am I going to get my treatment? They are estimating 3-4 days a week. I really don't think want her coming with me as she's very difficult and rude, I just let it go over my head as I'm used to her but I'm not having her embarrass me at the hospital.

I can't get anyone to sit sit with her for 3-4 days as she's alienated most of the family with her difficulty ways and rudeness, I'm in despair!

[silliemillie]

I'm going to se what my schedule will be and take it from there.

I live in Essex.
I read Tnkerbelles link about Maggie's with interest. There is one at Bart's Hospital, London. I spent 4 weeks as an in patient there a few years ago but did not know of it.

No one tells you anything do they? Most of the info I have ever had has been from others in similar situations, not NHS people.

[emmie]

get onto MacMillan cancer care see what they can do, or / and social services, they must be able to help.

[DTCwordfan]

McMillan's is an alternative for cover......

[marval]

I am so sorry to hear this Millie.

You must put yourself first now, your treatment is very important.

I can add any more advice than you have been given.

My thoughts and prayers are with you at this difficult time. xx

[Mamyalynne]

Remember too Millie, when you have to face up to anyone - be it Mum or an authority, imagine us all stood there with you.

[jennyjoan]

Millie - my friend has had breast cancer and the Marie Curie people have been brilliant with whatever she asks for - I'm sure you will get some kind of help if you contact them or they can advise you further. Good luck. x

[silliemillie]

Thanks again for everyone's continued support.

Mamy, that's a great idea, I will do just that.
I used to be such a confident, outgoing person but feel stripped of everything just now.

[237SJ]

I`m sorry that you are going through such strife. As far as your Mum is concerned, it might be worth looking at your local Council's website under Adult Social Care. They might be able to give you some guidance regarding help for your Mum while you are having treatment

[pastafreak]

I can't offer much, except my best wishes for you. I hope your mum realises it's time to think of you as that will aide your recovery.

[Tilly2]

Manipulative mothers are hard to deal with but, in this instance, you need to put yourself first. You can't look after her if you are not well and she really shouldn't expect you to. Do what you need to do and leave her to her own devices.

[anneasquith]

Millie, you will be that confident outgoing person once you feel better. :-)

[tinkerbell23]

Millie I flit in and out of Answerbank but if I can point you in any direction please give me
a shout, someone im sure will give me a nudge if I dont see it!

Maggies centres you just pop by, the kettle is always on, there are advisors around - financial advice, complementary therapies, and like minded people- take a friend if you feel like it? Its for anyone who is affected by cancer- you may even find advice from other folk there usefull, my patients love it!!

Much love xx

[anneasquith]

How are you tonight Millie ?

[silliemillie]

Evening Anne, I'm feeling much better now, thank you for asking.

I've spoken to a couple of family members who have promised to help so fingers crossed they can.
Trouble is, we are mostly a working family so they can't always get time off work.

My cousin is retired so she said she will help and my Son also, but he already works 6 days a week but he said he will take a day or 2 a week off, bless him.

So yes feeling more positive I have a few offers of help and all your listening ears to help me through. XxX

[anneasquith]

Good new s Millie, people are kind when we need them. Now you can concentrate on your treatment and wellbeing. .