Pocket Money for Teen Daughters

[Spoingie]

My daughters are expected to earn their pocket money.  The rate is 50p per job and a job is either washing up or drying or putting away two loads of laundry and so on.  I feel this is quite acceptable.  They have the potential for earning �5 a week or so.  The thing is they hardly ever do jobs, it's very sporadic.   But my eldest, who is 15, is giving me jip about it.  Saying that all her other friends get �1'000'000 a week for doing nothing.  Okay that's an exaggeration but you get my drift.  They don't go without, they have new clothes and I pay for treats like the cinema.  Am I being unfair, should I stick to my guns, and how exactly do you teach a child the value of money?

[andy hughes]

I think you are right to teach your children the value of money by letting them equate their spending power with the effort taken to earn it - how else do they learn how the real world works. As for the 'all my friends (insert the argument here)' line, that applies whether you give them money or not - they'd simply shift the argument to something else. It's all part of the interesting scenario where adolescents dip out of the uman race for a few years, don;t worry they do return ... eventually! 

[stoo_pid]

I remember trying the "all my friends (insert the argument here)" line on my parents & my Dad would always reply "Oh. Well, in that case you'd better go & live at your friends house then".  At which point I would become Kevin the teenager and sulk.  Now, of course, I discover I have somehow turned into my Dad & understand what it's all about.  As Andy says, your kids will too.

If it helps at all, when we were caring for my nephew we would give him �5 a week but he knew from the start that he would have to do stuff in return (clean his room once a week, help out when asked etc).  We thought about 'paying' for each task but decided against it as we felt he would consider each transaction on an individual & because of the small level of remuneration he would decide far too easily to say no.

The advantage we found was that we could be flexible (e.g. didn't have to keep finding jobs for the sake of it) but the fear of not getting any pocket money for that week was a very useful sanction (which incidentally we only ever had to withold once).

[Wraith]

I think you are absolutely right and should stick to your guns. I give mine �5 a week, but only if they earn it doing a job or jobs that need doing. Home is where these lessons have to start as these are some of the basic skills they will need in real-life. Things like this can't be taught by the schools.

 

My daughter wanted a new phone and went out and got a paper round for 6 months until she'd earned enough to buy it herself. I could never have taught her the lessons she learned if I'd bought it for her.

[natalie_1982]

I always used the "But my friends...." to which I got the response "Well I am not so-and-so's mother, I am your mother and I am telling you no!".

 

I think your children should earn their money without a doubt, and your 15 year old should realise that in order to get the money she has to work for it.  However, remember that �5 doesn't go far nowadays.  A magazine is around �1-2, a packet of sweets, a drink, nail varnish, etc and the money is gone so she probably doesn't feel like it's going anywhere. 

 

Why not try doing it monthly?  With �20 a month she'll be able to buy a top, a CD or DVD, etc and will see why she is working for the money, she will have something to show for it.  Or �10 a fortnight would work the same way. 

 

I understand you buy their clothes, and they're very lucky girls, but it's a different feeling altogether being able to buy your own.

[stoo_pid]

Of course, Wraith has a very good point about getting something like a paper-round for additional pocket-money.  There should be no reason why your eldest can't do the same - even when I was Kevin the Teenager I still had part-time jobs (which taught me a whole lot more than just the value of money).

[ICEMANSAV]

50p a job, thats slavery!! As someone else pointed out money doesn't go as far and doing 100 jobs a week, lets say at 10 mins per job your paying � 5 per 16 hours so where would the will to work be learnt from the grand wage of around 30-40 pence per hour, she will quickly learn to get pregnant, get a free house and large benefits.

[Spoingie]

But I don't have much money, I can't see how it would help to give her over and above what I could afford, I'd get in a pickle with my money too, which can't be good.  Believe me, I don't mean a lot of washing up.  It takes them 5 minutes to put laundry away, and at 50 p per 5 mins that would be �10 an hour!  Thta's not bad in my books!

[Spoingie]

�6 an hour, not �10, doh!!!  Still, better than what I got in my last admin job!

[ask-a-stupid]

�6 an hour.  Or in other words exactly twice the current minimum wage for 16-17 year olds.

[Miss Zippy]

I think ICEMANSAV is missing the point by trying to equate the 50p to an hourly rate!  The point is, you are absolutely right to make your daughter earn her pocket money.  She�s got to understand that you don�t get something for nothing in life. I think Wraith has a good point and you should perhaps encourage your daughter to get a part time job. I started a Saturday job in a clothes shop when I was 15 (most of my friends had part time jobs too at that age) and loved earning my own money.

[bernardo]

The straightforward answer to"Other parents give their children £1,000,000 per week" is "I'm not other parents"

[Spoingie]

Yeah lol, I do say that. Next time I thought I'd try the comeback suggested by Stoo_pid:  "Oh. Well, in that case you'd better go & live at your friends house then".  Funnily enough teen daughter has just left having been asked to do some housework at a friends for �10.  Sigh.

[ICEMANSAV]

See she is learning the value of money!

[xxlizziexx]

im 14 and i get �20 a month but thats for everything, my mum buys the main parts of my clothes if you get wot i mean like things i really really need and i buy the rest, pay for my mobile, cinema etc.

to b honest i think u should give them a bit of money anywayz each month but make them do things to earn more money. hope this helps xx

[Shellywba]

Tell them to get a job!

[andy_wood]

I am 12 and get 2 quid a week and i'm happy

[SGKelloe32]

My friends who relied on their mother for everythinghave now gone to uni and are 4000 in debt on credit cards.I never relied on my mother for money, as i was encouraged to work on a weekend from being 13. If I did ever get money off my parents, i always paid them back.And now, i can proudly say that at 20 years oldi have my own home, a mortgage, a beatiful littlergirl and absolutley no debt, all because i learnt the value of money at a young age!