Ex pulls my mates.

[amazingtoxic]

Am I right in thinking that both my ex and my mate are completes B******S for pulling each other?

I am sooo p*sed but they dont seem to see the problem?

Who is right here?

Thanks

[happygam]

Well said forget me not!!! Yeah, who hasn't been hurt one way or another, I don't think I would be a normal person If I said that I hadn't, I was hurt by boys in my teens, family members that have died, that hurts - so you will be right...I'l be right in saying that you probably have been hurt...people do things for reasons..we will never know why - its called being human...it doesn't bother me that you disagree...its a free country, we are entitled to an opinion...there is still no law on romance Mr Benn...!! You may not think lifes tooo short, but I do....that is my opinion...thats why I live it and enjoy it - make the most of it....nothing or nobody is worth falling out over...in time, they may get over whats gone on...and all become best mates - you'l be surprised what life throws at you!!

[happygam]

Sorry....forgot to add on....I am not still hurting at all Mr Benn, I got over my hurting there and then...don't know where you got that from at all...couldn't be at my happiest!! Thing is with me, I don't dwell on the past, or grudge anyone - I look to the future...cos I am healthy and alive!!

[MrBen5]

Hmmm, well said happygam. But i still think you are using the 'life is too short' thing as an excuse for your pain. Your obviously still hurting as you keep mentioning the past and all the people who were close to you dying. There is no need to keep using past events though to get over the pain. Have you had any counselling at all? Also i do think there are people worth falling out over. The people who are close to you must be worth an effort...

[4getmenot]

Ah bless happygam you sound like you are one happy chick with your head screwed on :-) At the end of the day there is no right or wrong, some people are very close mates that they wouldn�t ever do that to their mate where as some are such close mates that they would be happy that they are happy. :-)

[4getmenot]

Mr Benn I have lost many a close friend too and this has made me think life is too short aswell, as I said why be angry when you could lose them tomorrow. xx

[happygam]

Sorry, but how many times do I have to say it...I am not in pain...i have mentioned past, because of things you have said in your threads...I havn't mentioned people close to me that have died..just said it in passing...I don't like people doubting (especially who don't know me) what I say....my hubby will tell you how happy I am..my beaming smile at the thought of having my first child will tell anyone how happy I am...never needed/wanted counselling - as I have a top family and top friends if I have ever needed to talk to someone - which hasn't been done in years - because my life is sorted!! Anyway...the question wasn't asked by me...I'v just offered an opinion, like everybody else has...!! Thanks 4get me not, I have my head screwed on and I am a happy chick..please can you convince MrBenn...Mr Benn, I am not going to justify myself anymore - as the question wasn't about me - I am going home to my luvly life, to my luvly hubby...nighty night...

[ummmm]

happygam....I think he is winding you up!

[NH]

"You know baby all is fair
In love and war,
Yeah, you know baby all is
Fair in love and war,
But what the hell did
They have to do that for..."

[Goodsoulette]

I wouldnt have a problem with my ex but my mate, it would feel a bit strange.

Let them get on with it, if you cant handle being around them, then dont be around them. If you badger them about it you'll only lose your friend anyway. We all say friends are more important but that rarely seems to be true doesnt it?

[Gef]

Can't believe it. I've read all the answers on here and they are very mixed. All I said was "grow up" and my answer was banned - presumably on the request of the question author. This will probably be banned as well but all I was saying was live and let live. It's not the end of the world and they haven't done anything wrong.

[Miss Inquiry]

Amazingtoxic, if ever any of my friends got together with an ex of mine I would be really really hurt. As kids we always used to talk about this, we have an unwritten rule that you simply DON'T DO IT.

I don't think any of my friends would ever do it, after listening to all the good and bad points about the man, listening to all the gory details of our sex life, wiping up the tears, offering advice, it would be far too close for comfort.

[joko]

i would think they haven't entered into this lightly - knowing you may not like it etc, but the fact that they did shows this is likely much more meaningful than just a bit of a fling, so surely if these two can find real love together - you should be happy for them!

i agree with jno and happygam - you have no say in this - these 2 people are free to do whatever they like and they probably didn't tell you, not to be sneaky but to spare your feelings - at least until they were sure it was going to go somewhere.

if you had only just split up and still had feelings for him then i'd understand, but 5 years and you are married, is a bit long for you to still think you have some kind of say in his life.

it may feel odd but if you care about either of these 2 people, as you claim to, then you will wish them well and get over it.

be aware that most people would choose the love of their life over a best friend, so don't even think about issuing ultimatums