Rose tinted specs

[Petal~flower]

When your relationship has finished (mine did in March) and you are getting over all the heartbreak and everything else. Why is it, you still remember all the good times, and never the bad?

[GeordiePengy]

When you have a close attachment to someone or something, you tend to concentrate on the positive aspects in order to maintain your close affinity.

Likewise, if you have a bad attachment to someone or something then you will focus on the negatives in order to remind yourself how bad the experience was.

It is how you choose to remember something during a period of time, that determines how you remember it in the future.

I'm sure there's some psychological babble for it.

[Lore]

I think a lot depends on why it ended and who decided to end it.
In my case, the bad times are very fresh in my memory. (even tho it was over 4 years ago)
It's given me enough confidence to get on with my life knowing that I'll never let myself be put in a situation I have no control over ever again.

Sometimes things are sent to try us, this worked for me and I'm a new person (for the better) because of it.

[unrulyjulie]

I echo what Lore says and i feel exactly the same although mine is way more recent!

[nowaypedro]

Hy petal I can assure you that is all part of the self healing process and it is good for you to remember the good stuff and it shows that you are healing and gradually getting over it.

If all that you remembered at the moment was the bad times then you could end up being bitter and twisted.
So life is for living just get out there and do it..
Good luck to you and if you want to make a donation to good advise then I do take paypal.

This is just for you and hope I have cheered you up a bit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCWw6W5NEa8

[Petal~flower]

Thank you all for your input and advice. Very much appreciated.

The even better days, are when I take the specs off and dont think of him at all!

Thanks for the link nowaypedro (love the name) :-)

[legend758duo]

i think its a defence mechanism .

an attempt to forget the pain and the upset.

the betrayals or disappointments.


so you obviously think of the good times to numb the pain and make things seem better.

[legend758duo]

i think its a defence mechanism.

in an attempt to numb the pain of heartache or disappointments and betrayals .

we tend to think of the good times to make us feel better and help us thru the day.

[Petal~flower]

Think you are right there legend.

Thanks for taking time to reply