Dating an EX

[SHELLP]

Hi

Most of you on here know that I have just come out of a violent relationship and deep down not sure if I still have feelings for him, however a male friend who I knew before this last relationship has got in touch and asked me if I would like to go for a drink with him.

He has heard all about the break up and said he was worried thats why he got in touch (havent seen him for 4 years) I did like him and went on a few dates but didnt feel it was going anywhere.

I dont think i'm ready to move on yet still think of my ex a lot even though know theres no going back.

Do I go for a drink with him or not?

[Teneref]

i think you are a very confused child.

take time out and clear your head.

[ThEsTiRrEr]

yeh bob

[Barmaid]

Sounds to me like you could use all the friends and support you could get right now.

Why not respond to his invitation by saying something like "a drink would be lovely thank you. Its nice to know I still have your support and friendship and I really could do with a friendly ear right now." IF he is looking for more, you may have to be less subtle. But it is the first step to moving on.

[lil75]

Agree with barmaid 100%...why not go out as friends? theres more to life than sitting in moping over an a*se! Go and enjoy yourself

[SHELLP]

He knows all that has gone on and that I am feeling very vunerable at the moment.

Rightly or wrongly cant deny that I would like someone to see me out and tell me ex but this seems like im being unfair

[lil75]

If its only out of spite then it isnt fair as you could land this fella in a fight and is that what you really want.....you need to concentrate on gettin your life back together instead of concentrating on a looser

[SHELLP]

I would enjoy catching up find out whats been happening but cant deny part of me would be pleased if it got back but would not gon anywhere he is likely to be

[Sgt.Rock]

Told you a few days ago you'll take him back, only a matter of time.

[SHELLP]

I WILL NOT TAKE HIM BACK

Sorry for caps but he doesnt listen. I will go to court and give evidence against him and the feelings I have for him will go eventually. Anyway who says he wants to come back he is telling lies about me to everyone and he has had a new relationship why would I want to put myself through this again?

[Velvetee]

If you are the type who is drawn into situations, without really wanting to, then you probably shouldn't meet him. If you now have the confidence to control all aspects of your life and want to meet this guy on a purely platonic basis, then it could be fun.

If you've just come out of this violent relationship, you need time to reflect and understand deeply, that a violent man isn't worth the thoughts or feelings you say are still lingering. It's best to stay on your own and grow as an individual. Many people who have been in destructive relationships, don't usually have the opportunity to really be their own person.