Bullying and health

[pelican8000]

I wonder if anyone else has had this sort of experience. Last Wednesday I was bullied by my manager at work. He is a big guy, used to work as a bouncer in Brixton. He was very personal, and extremely aggressive, and afterwards I felt totally demoralised. For the next two days I was unable to sleep properly or eat. By the Friday I was starting to feel phobic about being near him, and about sitting on my own in the rest room. I got extremely upset, which was noticed by several people. I think this adverse reaction worried my manager, and he apologised to me, which I accepted. However, since then, I have still not been able to sleep well, or eat, and today, the Monday after the event, I am still feeling phobic about sitting on my own in the est room. Is this normal?

[tufty7]

This is not acceptable , Personal threats and comments are a sign of his insecurity in his position , he chose a victim and gets off on it , raise a grievance or have a word with someone higher just to log that this has happened, and that the manager has apologised for his behaviour, , i know its old fashioned but there is only one way to stop bullys and that is to stand up for them , i would go off sick and when you contact him say that the personal remarks and threats incident has stressed you out and you have been unable to sleep, he is unlikely to have much to say about that when you have a your return to work interview, but do get his card stamped by logging it with higher management , you may need it if it was to continue..... best of luck !

[terambulan]

So long as u have been employed for at least 1y you can threaten your employer with a Tribunal.....get advice from Citizens Advice Bureau as in some cases they will assist on a lesser employment time.

Once your boss knows you've threatened/started this action his own job could be in jeopardy he will soon tame down. Just 'cause he's built like an ape doesn't mean he can behave like one.....unless he wants to be caged. ;-))

[pelican8000]

Thank you both for your replies. Yes, tufty7 I am currently finding out about getting this put on record somewherre. Unfortunately I think at this early stage it will be my word against his, so reluctant to take it up officially. However, I bought a dictation machine at the weekend, and will be recording any future one to one's I have with him.

[Velvetee]

Hi Pelican, what sort of company do you work for and what did this manager say to you and why?

Is there a superior or personnel department? I think you should make a complaint as that sort of behaviour is wrong and shows he has poor management skills.

[Lil O'lady]

One of the key supports for you in this situation is your union rep, so if not in a union actively consider this now. The man you work for will have done this before, probably to people who are now sitting round watching thinking 'thank goodness it's him not me.' Unless stopped he will do it again, possibly to you, and he is just backing off while he works out what you're gonna do about it.
It is absolutely normal to feel physically ill and very upset in these circumstances. Bottom line is, you go to work in return for a wage, not to be abused, and the law is completely on your side.
Please also see your doctor becasue from the sound of things you need signing off for a while to get your strength back. This is not a sign of weakness, it is an important legal marker that a medical expert has seen you and belives you to be unwell.
Hang on in there peli and let us know how you are going on.

[gucciman]

it all depends if you work for a larger professional company with a clear management structure or if its a small company and this manager is the best friend of the owner or m.d in which case your not going to get anywhere.
but bigger companies these days are paranoide about being sued and take bullying very seriously.
even if it is your word against his if they start getting regular complaints about the same guy then they will have to look into it further.
if you keep it quiet he will keep doing it, if you report him then he wil know he can't get away with his bullying.