off to New Zealand

[afcjan]

my son is going to New Zealand on Wednesday for a working holiday. he has got a visa for a year but said if he doesnt like it he will be back sooner.

his girlfriend is out there and they will get a place together.

can anyone tell me how you cope with this big change in his life. he is fine, its me thats the blubbering wreck, able to talk about it then 5 mins later sobbing my heart out.

i would love to hear from anyone who has been through something similar even if just to tell me how you coped with it all. I am going to miss him ever so much.

TIA

[filibuster]

afcjan, I haven't actually been through this situation although my daughter does live abroad with her family and we do see them fairly often.

I can well understand that you will miss your son but, as parents, we know the day will come when our children want to move away, and there is nowhere further than NZ. However, nowadays you can have constant contact by 'phone, by internet and even see one another by webcam. My OH and I have been to NZ and it really is a beautiful place and, if I were fit, I'd go there again in a heartbeat.

Try to think of the positive things about your son's move because, deep down, you know it's what he wants to do with his life.

I hope you don't think I'm being flippant as I certainly don't mean to be as I totally understand your anguish.

[afcjan]

thank you filibuster for such a lovely positive answer. I know he has to do it for himself and I wouldnt want him to not go and resent it for the rest of his life.

the world is now a very small place and he is after all only going to be 24 hours away.

it is hard but we have to let go sometimes.

[tamborine]

my 3 have all done the annual skive. Wonderful stories/pics & experiences that they treasure. They returned matured & more considerate of family, home & care.

My only advice is - if working their way, the pay is minimal - so have back-up finance (return fare). Too many 'travellers' have fouled laws to raise return fares.

[filibuster]

Thank you for accepting what I said in the way in which it was meant.

On Wednesday, you will find the parting difficult but try to make it as easy on yourself and your son as possible. If you don't already have one, buy a webcam and when he is set up online, you will be able to see and talk to him.

I'll be thinking of you both.

[jonah hart]

I think the build up to him going can be actually worse.. Once you no he's there safely u may feel a little better .. I travelled for many years an really did come home a different person ( for the better) and just thankgoodness for mobile phones an the Internet :) sounds daft now but a year really does go so quick ... I really do feel for you but how great that u have a son with so much courage to travel away from his family :) x