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hydn363 | 21:19 Sat 06th Nov 2004 | Parenting
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I'm 13 and my boyfriend is 16 and we had sex without a condom and I am really scared that I could be pregnant and I no we should have used a condom and my mom is dead and I don't feel comfortable talking to my dad about it and I don't know where to go so that I could get checked out without my dad finding out. Please help me!

hydn363 11-06-04

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First of all, pregnancy is only one danger of having unprotected sex.  He's your boyfriend, yes, and you love him, but you still can't be sure who he's been with before (of if he's being faithful now).  You are running the risk of catching a sexually transmitted disease, so PLEASE, if you're going to have sex, USE A CONDOM!

That said, unless you can go see your doctor in the meantime, wait until your next period is due.  If it comes on time, all is well.  If not, you can buy a home pregnancy test and follow the instructions.  If it's positive, you need to get to your doctor, and also get some counseling as to your choices (you can keep the baby, you can choose not to have it, you can have it and put it up for adoption).  At 13, you're really too young to make a decision like that on your own, so I hope you can find a trusted adult (aunt, school teacher, etc) that you feel comfortable talking to.  Good luck!

ok carm down, getting really worked up about it isnt going to do you any good what so ever. im 14 so i can relate to your problem. ok im sorry about your mum same happened to my dad but its differnt beacuse its a dad not a mum anyway,
go to the shop and buy a pregnecy test, just to make sure that you are not pregnent.
if you dont want to tel your dad personaly then talk to your school about it, they would tell the your dad beacuse thats what they have to do. so they would break the ice for you.
you are proberly scared that your dad is going to kill you or something, dont worry i would be to with my step dad!! so your not alone. you need to tell him though. he might be mad and may even shout at you, but he can offer surport that no one else can give. he will try and understand and im sure very much that he will help you. he proberly will be angry but i mean put yourself in his shoes you would be angry wouldnt you! im sure he would carm down though.
you really need to go and see a doctor about it aswell to make sure you dont have any STI's ( sexualy transited infections ) beacuse you might have one and so its extremly important you go the doctors.
im really pleases that you know you sohuld of used a condom thats really important to, just rember it for next time.

i hope this helps and please keep us updated on whats going on xx

first dont be scared you have options. the best is tell your dad. if my dad was the only parent i had, i would tell him. your dad'll probably go balistic for a while but its worth it, he will calm down and support you. if he starts saying hurtful stuff - he doesnt mean it, its a shock to any parent, think what you might say. if you want courage before telling him, try calling the smaritans or child line or something - dont know the number right off its in the phone book, they are free. but still you have to tell someone. its not right you doin everything alone.

<hugs> xx  

haydn

Look at this website for Brook Advisory and then find out if there is one near you.  They are really helpful and confidential.

http://www.brook.org.uk/content/M1_gotobrook.asp

Hello Hydn363

If you have had unprotected sex in the last 72 hours, you MUST go to your GP, as he will be able to prescribe the morning-pill for you.

DO NOT wait and see if your period comes. Thats taking too much of a risk. I'm sure you might feel uncomfortable going to see your GP and telling them whats happened, but you wont be the first girl that they've had through the door with the same problem. Getting through a consultation with your Dr is a lot easier than the prospect of having to tell your dad that you're pregnant, and then having to make choices that no 13 year old girl should have to make.

Most Drs surgeries have a 'drop-in' teenage clinic..... so call them up to ask, but remember.. you have to take the morning after pill WITHIN 72 hours of having sex to be protected against pregnancy.

Failing this... you could go to your local Family planning clinic... you can probably get there number by ringing 118118.

Please use a condom if you're going to have sex. But it really would be best if you could NOT have sex. There are lots of ways that you and your boyfriend can enjoy each other without going this far. Are you aware that girls who start having sex at an eary age put themselves more at risk of developing cervical cancer later in life? Are you aware that there are LOADS of sexually transmitted infections which you can have in your body, and never even know about because they have no symptoms? They can damage your reproductive system, and you only realise this when you're older and trying for a baby, and cant get pregnant.

PLEASE dont just hope for the best, PLEASE see your GP or go to the family planning clinic...  and try to take better care of yourself from now on.

I wish you the very best and hope this turns out ok for you. Jo

In my own area, it is an abuse for a 13-year old to be sexually active. A reason is that such is considered too young and inexperienced especially as he/she may be exposed to various kinda STD's. As you are already having cold feet as to what may be the outcome of the encounter, I suggest you see a GP to put your mind to rest as soon as possible.

Take care.

Apart from all the advice above, I'd say he also needs to be prosecuted for having sex with an underage girl. He is legally responsible and you are under the age of consent, whether you consented or not.

hey,i was wondering...im  14 and my boyfriend is 16. yeah were intiment and all,we've had sex..with a condom..and onvce in a while we do  it without one..he never you know..busted in me,so can tyou get pregnent still?and one time..2 weeks ago he busted,but he pulled out befor he did..and nothin got inside or on me.so do you think i could get pregnent?please help!well yeah,comment back quickly!thank you!

 

Melissa

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