changing a police statement

[tazz]

hi not sure what to do. here goes. beginning of may me and my partner had a heated arguement. which resaulted in him accidentially hurting me. the police then got involved and now has kept us apart up till this date. his bail has been extended twice. we been told that cos bail we cannot talk. all we want to do is sit down and sort it out as we have 2 kids a house and a bussiness together. its effcting my health n stressing us all out. i dont know what to do as this is going on way to long n just seems to be dragging out. im thinking about ringing them and telling them that it didnt happen or something anything to help. any suggestions would b great.
thanx

[sara3]

you won't be the first to do the "but I love him" routine. let's hope he doesn't "accidentally" assault you again, huh?

[tazz]

it was thou and hes having cancelling too. i dont know what to do. if i say it didnt happen what will happen then?

[sara3]

who called the police and why? and did you lie on your statement?

[tazz]

i dialed there number then put phone down i didnt want them to do this i just wanted the situation to b calmed down. no i didnt lie but it was a accident and i did put that. its causing me so much stress now thou and all i want is my family back.

[sara3]

you dialled 999 because you were scared. was the "accident" before or after the call?

[gossipgirl]

ive been a victim of domestic violence and many times i 'changed ' my statement because i felt guilty, and do you know what.........he did it again and again! the fact is you felt so threatened by him that you felt you need to call the police, that itself shows how bad things were and then you say he accidently assaulted you, Who said it was an accident....you or him? Believe me im not judging you i just feel that maybe your partner should take the punishment wether you get back together or not and take it as a lesson learnt. The police obviously are taking it very seriously {thank god} and your injuries must be substantial for them to do that. Also you say hes having councelling, well this would indicate that he knows he has a problem with his temper. Has this happened before? Is he known to the police? If this WAS a one off incident then there is no reason why you couldnt make this work, but if he has done this before chances are he will do it again.

[sara3]

well said, gossipgirl x

[tazz]

i had cut on my head that was it n i said it was accident i could just tell. he went to hurt me then thought better of it n let go. i fell thats what did it. yeh its a one off n norm so nice.

[gossipgirl]

the fact alone that he was going to hurt you is enough to justify why you SHOULDNT taken back your statement. He has a problem with his temper, let him get help for it, lrt him get punished for it! domestic violence is a serious issue, no one should feel scared in their own home. if this is his 1st offence then chances are he will only get a fine and probation, perhaps community service too, and rightly so. That in itself, if he truley is sorry will teach him never to raise his hand again! also i would like to tell you that the police have new laws now to go ahead with prosecutions without your consent, so retraacting your statement will make no difference. If there is substantial evedence that a assault has taken place then thats all they need. in some cases. Iwas told on one occasion by a female liasion officer after my partner assaulted me, that because of the number of many abused women retract there statements, out of fear alone, the police will go ahead with the case regardless to get a conviction on the victims behalf.
under no curcumstances should you say it never happend as you will face prosecution for perverting the course of justice, and possibly face a prison sentence yourself. At the end of the day your partner did wrong, he should suffer the consequences.

[Barquentine]

There are few things that make me more angry than to hear that a man had used violence against a woman. The only thing to make me more angry is when females put up with it, forgive and take the man back.
I'd bet your bloke is good-looking and fit and really popular with his mates. It's only because you regard him as a good catch that you want to convince yourself it won't happen again. Deep inside you there's a very small voice that knows it will happen again.
You can either do right now what you are desperately trying to pretend you don't need to do or waste more years. Time is very short. You'll remember this reply in 5 years time if you don't do what I don't even need to spell out.
You know that violence should be met with zero tolerance. If you tolerate this....etc .
Your brain is saying...but how am I supposed to do this, or where do I go to find out that? Once you've made a decision to do something though your own resourcefulness will kick in.