adult bullying...

[tinkerbell23]

anyone been a victim? what did you do? - was going to ask can this happen but personally i think of course it can xx

[karenmac60]

I'm trying to figure out what that symbol is meant to be - the mind boggles!

Molly has been bullied, but she gives short shrift to the bullies - good on her :)

[tinkerbell23]

no matter where is occurs ...do you go back? ie would you stay off the site/ switch jobs/ stay at home/ get new friends....or personally...stick two fingers up and rise above it? x

[karenmac60]

I think that would depend on how bad it was and what your options were. I'd be inclined to stick it out, but if it got to the extent my health was suffering and I had no other recourse then I'd give it a wide berth if at all possible.

[ttfn]

Tink, my rule is - I have to be happy with myself, first and foremost. My words are always weighed carefully before delivery. I suppose age and experience helps me to handle most situations and I just deal with them as I will. At the end of the day I haven't given any grief out to anyone unless they really asked for it and ignored the warning signs. That way I am happy to live with myself. I do think it is important to sleep on difficult matters before acting on them. That I will always try to do. Quite often I have delayed a response to find that the other side has apologised or retracted and I give them every credit for so doing. It is all part of life's rich pageant. We learn by trial and error too.

[tinkerbell23]

wise words ttfn!!! yeah karen i know what you mean x

[anneasquith]

i do think it happens in the work place,,,,,,,like some abers i have noticed a type of bullying (maybe not the appropriate word ) on AB, but its quite skillfully done and easily missed,but not worth any further details from me........

[AlBags]

Yes .. I like my symbols : )

[karenmac60]

Ta Tshshshshshshsh (cymbals - geddit?) ;) xx

[saxy_jag]

My husband was bullied by his boss and boss' sidekick to the extent that he had a nervous breakdown and spent six months off work. Useless seeking advice on here for him because many people poo-pooed it as 'it's part of working life and you just have to learn to cope with it'. However, my husband referred himself to occupational health, who arranged counselling for him and he moved to another department which is much better. Moreover it seems that his boss wasn't just a bully but a seriously incompetent manager who's lost his employer the best part of half a million and has been suspended with little possibility of return. My husband's 'new' boss has been on the investigating team and my husband has been able to work with them to give lots of valuable evidence.

He's experienced enough to know now when people are trying to bully him and he simply won't let them do it. As he says, he knows now that he has nothing to lose and everything to gain by whistle-blowing to the right people. Usually, when you face up to people who try to bully you, they often turn out to be not quite as powerful as they like to think they are.

[AlBags]

Is that the sound of you doing something Karen .. Like charades, this! xx

[karenmac60]

It was meant to be cymbals - you said you liked symbols ;)

[tinkerbell23]

thank you saxy, ur husband is sooo right!! and glad to hear that he is ok now...i think i just will keep ploughing on! :0)

[craft1948]

I was bullied in the workplace when I was 16 and didn't at that time have the confidence or knowhow to do anything about it. I left and luckily got a far better job anyway. Years later I bumped into my old boss and he admitted he knew it was going on but was scared to intervene.
I was bullied again at work when in my 30's, I complained to my line manager who did nothing, so I made a formal complaint to my union. The bully was moved and promotion-blocked for 2 years.