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How do I get my husband to leave?

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pollym | 17:25 Tue 16th Sep 2008 | Family & Relationships
11 Answers
I cannot take anymore years with him, he lies, he cheats, he's lost us our home and I want him out.
I have no choices and I'm trapped. I cannot drive because we've never had any money (thanks to his big mistakes) and we have 3 children. I have nowhere to go. It makes more sense for him, with a car and family to stay with to go. But he won't. What can I do. Life is short and I've been unhappy for years. I cannot take anymore.
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Want him out of where ?

Go where ?


Im confused.
Question Author
I want him to leave me. I can't leave him, I am trapped but he has the means to go and refuses to. I don't want this marriage anymore, I can't take the lies and stress anymore but I have no say in it.
I understand pollym -he has a family to go to -therefore it makes more sense for him to go -but he wont leave the house.

There are a few legal eagles on here probably familiar with Family Law -so maybe post it there and you'll get solid advice.

I agree -life is too short to stay with someone who has no respect for you and vice versa.

Good Luck.
Try going to Citizens advice. They are often very helpful. You could get him to move out on cruelty grounds. You could also try making it difficult for him to stay. Stop doing anything for him (meals, washing). You may be able to get free advice from a solicitor if you are entiled to it because of low income. They may suggest some ideas. If it gets really bad, try a womens refuge. Social services may be able to help if you say the children are being effected. Hope this helps a little. Getting him to go is the hard part. Once he is gone it will be easier. Good luck.
Question Author
Thanks, I tried CAB but they are so busy they don't answer (I've been ringing for a week now), there's no CAB near enough for me to go to personally.
Are you living in a rented house? Do you own the house? Is it a council house? You say that he's lost you your home so I am also a bit confused as to the living arrangement.
Don't cook him any dinner, that will guarantee him leaving!!!

Well it works for mine!!!
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Can you get to a CAB by bus? You sound as if you re at breaking point, They are really good at getting things sorted so it would be good if you can get to one. The council have a duty to house you in a hostel to start with. If your house is rented you,ve got nothing to lose.
But first get to a solicitor. Initial consultations are usually free. If you have little means of income you will definately get legal aid. If Abu Hamza is entitled to it, I'm sure you are!!
I feel so sorry for you as I was once in exactly the same position and it is horrible. The CAB told me to change the locks when he was out, so I did. Simple as that. I couldn't believe it. I bagged all his stuff up and threw it outside and threatened to call the police if he tried to get in !
Good luck xx
I lived like that for many years. Hated my life, even thought about going missing! One day he was just lonking on the sofa as usual and I was folding washing, and I calmly said. "I think we should call it a day" That got his attention. I said "You don't love me, you need me, but you don't love me and I don't want to end up hating you, I want you to move out, so we can be amicable for the kids sake". There were tears and pleading but I stuck to what I had rehearsed and he went out. When he came back he said he had thought about it and agreed to move out. I helped him move out to a room ffor the sake of my little girl who was devastated. I hated helping but I needed to make sure she knew where he was and he was ok. Only wish I had done it 20 years earlier, but I had been too scared to.

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