Fed up with husband.....

[Cantthinkof12use]

Been with husband for 9 years, moved away from family in City to live with husband in country 5 years ago. Have young son. Very close to my family, last time mum and younger bro came to stay over, husband had a go at my bro over something which I consider trivial. I was torn between the 2. Husband can get awkward over silly things alot of the time, can sulk for days, but when everything is going fine we are very happy. Am now getting to the point where I am sick and tired of him picking at me and my family. Also I gave up work when I had my son as couldnt get part time work, and when in a mood over something he alwyas brings up that I dont work, basically I feel that he resents that I dont work and he does. There are so many more things I could go into. I feel like he is driving me away when he has these moods, but when all is ok, we have a great life.

[keirah]

Sounds like a control freak who loves control dramas to me. I guess it was his idea for you to move away from your family..

Just wondering why don't you work?

[growlybear]

For the sake of your small son, try and settle things down. You must have known he could get awkward over wee things before marriage, so why the surprise now?

Look at the options of you working, if that's what he would prefer you do. Check out childcare and costings, availability of work and costings eg business clothes, travel. Then sit down and go over the options in as calm a way as possible. I'm assuming there is a drop in money coming in thus the niggles about work.

On the other hand if you can't see a way forward, don't immediately run back to mum but try and talk things over with husband with no shouting or angry words from you.

[radiogaga]

Hello cantthinkofusername.
i know someone who is in a similar situ as yourself.
its not easy to be told you dont work.
have you thought about becoming a childminder as then you could have the best of both worlds looking after your son while getting paid to mind other children at your home.
failing that, go get a job at weekends, dicover you again, then hopefully he wont be able to moan at you for not having one.
and tell him the sulking thing is not a good example for the child to see.

[mazie]

I'm fed up with mine, so if you want to swap?

[ninja100]

Cutting to the chase so-to-speak -
the root of the problem sounds like his possessiveness
the root of possessiveness is usually insecurity
the root of his insecurity must be addressed
that root is probably very deep-seated in him & nothing to do with you personally..
sounds like his resentment of you is really resentment of himself in some twisted way
you could help him face it but you'll have to work at it together
it will be worth it
good luck


.

[Fed]

go back to family for a holiday and see if he misses you - usually works!

[lady-janine]

my ex started like that but eventually it worse and so bad that i walked out. filled the car with children and their essential things and left. best thing ever. by the way we did go to relate first. he was charming there and then changed when we got back.
good luck and be careful - remember you are worth much more than a bully.

[DTCwordfan]

Very true lady janine