Food
I got kicked out of the cinema last night for bringing my own food in with me.
I was gutted. Its ages since I've had a barbecue.
Many people are worrying about the effects of genetically modified crops.
"There is no proof of any adverse affects", said one Carrot.
I'm red all over. From my head tomatoes.
I bought a box of animal shaped biscuits and it said on it "Do not eat if seal is broken."
So I opened up the box, and sure enough.
My mate asked if I wanted to join his religious sect where they worship a probiotic drink.
I said, "I'm not interested in Yakult."
When it comes to breakfast, 3 bowls of porridge is the bear minimum.
My girlfriend bet me that I couldn't make a car out of vermicelli.
You should've seen her face as I drove pasta.
Never mess with a layered dessert made of custard, fruit, sponge cake, fruit juice and whipped cream.
It is not something to be trifled with.
I now realise why it’s not ideal to eat ice cream while using a laptop.
I was talking to my sister online and she asked me why I was typing so slowly,
so I replied, 'well my other hands busy;
She hasn't replied yet.
As I opened the second bottle of brandy I started to think seriously about what I was doing to my liver.
Then I realised I was frying it with onions.