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Superstar22 | 19:31 Fri 05th Nov 2004 | Parenting
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Im 13 and my boyfriend is talking about having sex what should I say? Help! I need advice.
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Are you ready for treatment of a sexually transmitted disease?  Are you ready to have a baby and take care of it until it's 18 years old?  Are you ready to be dropped like a hot potato if you tell him you're pregnant? Are you ready to face the taunts when he tells everyone around school that you are easy?  Are you ready for the consience pangs on your wedding night when you have nothing to share with your husband? Please, talk to your parents first, at the very least....
Say NO.  Also if you are in the UK it is illegal for a girl to have sex under the age of 16, so your boyfriend could be prosecuted it the authorities found out.  

 Do not let anyone pressure you in to anything  that you do not want to do also remember you are only 13 and it it illegal for you to be having sex my advice to you would be to wait until your older when you feel you are ready to have sex and its your own choice and decision and you are (over 16 ) and always remember to use a condom.

Superstar22 please do not be pushed into anything by your friends and your boyfriend  and if he does put pressure onto you then he's not worth keeping as a boyfriend you want someone who will respect your  decision -take care.  x

 We had the very same question asked recently by a 14 year old girl ! now this one is from a 13 year old !!!!! not getting us ' bankers at it ' are you ?,, IF  your dad offers you a tenner to go out, you'll definately say " yes please "   so now LEARN  how to say " NO thank you " you can type, you can spell, you can use the computer to contact a/b,,,,, you aren't daft ! which  makes me suspect that you ARE  trying to wind us all up !! if it's TRUE what you write, then i'm sorry, but then, with the brains you've got, and attended the sex education lessons in your school, you WILL already KNOW  what our response will be, what good, true advice will be given, and you DO KNOW HOW TO SAY " YES  or NO",,,,,, take it, or become just another young teenage mum,,,,, i know what the lads in your school will be calling you tho' !!

Say no. By asking your question here it can be assumed that you aren't ready yet. Tell him you want to wait until you feel ready. If he truly cares for you he will wait.

 

Take care Superstar22.

how old is your boyfriend ???
it depends how old he is and how long you both have been going out, do you really care about him? do you think about him when he is not there? do you have a picture of him on your wall at home? have you done anything eccpet kiss?
if you are really thinking about having sex with him then you shouldnt until your 16. im 14 and i thought i was going to have sex with a guy i no beacuse i thought he really cared for me when he didnt, he jsut wnated to use me for sex, lucky i didnt sleep with him.
you 13 yea, my moto is that you have the rest of yuor life to have sex why do you want it now?? if you really want to have sex with your boyfriend then why dont you do other things first, liek fingering and that sort of thing if you both really love each other. its a better way and more fun. wait till your 16 to have sex, you will regret it proberly if you have it now. hope this helps xx

Nice to see a sensible answer on here from a young girl in the same age group,  That will be so much more help to Superstar22 than anything we can say.  Thanks xxLizziexx
your welcome fakeplastic im here to try and help!

Good to see an answer from a teenager. Well thought out xxlizziexx. You have a sound outlook.

 

Children have the gift of innocence and day by day a little bit is lost. Don't be so eager to lose it to soon.

I hope he isnt one of those creepy older guys that goes for younger girls.  My best mate was 14 when she started seeing a twenty two year old.  I think it is just really strange.  If he is one of those guys then say no!! but if you have been with him for a while and he is your age or a year older then you will know when you are ready.  Watch out for some real W**KERS though

hi superstar

i started having sex with my boyfriend then 16, when i was 14 years old, i dont regret one thing and we are still together now, and none of those horrible things that the first poster said have happened to me because i was in a stable loving relationship, and frankly i dont think age comes into it, its maturity and situation and trust more than anything. That said, i am expecting my first child in March 2005, so think about that.My child is not unwanted and was not planned but life leads us in directions...be VERY careful is my advice. You arent very clear as to wether you want to have sex with this boy or not, because if you have any doubt in your mind, do not have sex. if you feel he is trying to force you in any way, get rid of him and tell a parent. It may be illegal, but my boyfriend is now 17 and i am 15 and there is not a thing the authourities can do about it, believe me my mother tried. do what you feel is right, dont let anyone pressure you into anything. take care of yourself and make the right choice for you

love abi xx

I hate to say it but I think it is totally wrong and immoral to expect a 13yr old to have sex. Depending on where you live and the laws, your boyfriend could be charged with having sex with a minor at least....in some places the charge could be statetory rape.

 

Think long and hard before you even consider saying yes, and then if you are 100% sure that it is what you want, then use a condom to prevent an unwanted pregnancy and catching any STI's.

 

Remember AIDS is for life. 

Question Author
I dont know what to say to boys cause there always trying to get some thing from me. They wanna try and have sex with me so what should i do? they won't back off!!!! HELP!

Superstar22 - If they don't back off when you say No, like you say, remind them of some of the things people have said here - that might help.

Lots of people have offered great advice to you here, but remember we can't really know the best things to suggest because we don't know all the circumstances. 

Is there someone you can talk to - at school perhaps - someone you can trust to give you good advice, who knows you and maybe knows the boys as well. If you tell them you want to talk in strictest confidence they won't make a problem for you with the boys but they will help to give you the confidence to get your message across - "No"!

Don't do it!! I had sex when i was 12/13, if the male really cares about you he wouldn't say anything, most of the time you would just be classed as a **** or slag (if he told, which most likey he would), only wait until you and your bf are both ready, i'm still in my teenage years,  and still have a few to go, but honestly don't do it unless you feel completly ready and happy to do it good luck x

i think that you will no when the time is wright, and when you find a boyfriend who loves you like you love him im only 14 and i loved some one so much but i didnt do nothing because we both wanted to wait till it was perfect! but i havent done nothing because i want to be with him for a lilttle bit longer then we will both no. I might have it when im 14-15-16 you never no i think you sholuld be allowed to do it when you feel ready not when a stupid rule tells you when to or you eould feel like the nazis all loked up do it when you are proud to do it with thats what im going to do!

Say no because you are only 13 years of age. just tell him to wait and if he cant leave him alone because he dont want you anyways. No matter if he do say he loves you, DONT DO IT :JUST SAY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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