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BANANASPLITS

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Patsy33

Just Wrapped..

Just wrapped up some batteries for Xmas. Toys not included..
13:02 Mon 03rd Dec 20189 answers, last by Ahimanshukhaira 10:12 Wed 05th Dec 2018
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Farrwest

Electric Toaster

I have a breville toaster which I understood to be the top of the line. However I find that it takes so long to toast that the bread is virtually baked. I've always found the best toast I ever tasted...
16:54 Mon 03rd Dec 201817 answers, last by TonyV 13:18 Tue 04th Dec 2018
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soliloquy

Michael Mcintyre's Big Show

Does anybody find this programme entertaining?
21:18 Sat 01st Dec 201839 answers, last by Denton 20:55 Mon 03rd Dec 2018
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Tyrion44

Horse Racing

Looking at the race cards in the Daily Mail for the 2.40 at Newcastle yesterday I saw that many of the horses had their form figures ending with a #. Can anyone explain what this means please. Many...
07:53 Sun 02nd Dec 201816 answers, last by Tyrion44 11:56 Thu 06th Dec 2018
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marval

My Partner

My partner and I were arguing over who got to eat the last gherkin, what a pickle. I was on the net earlier. I now have a life ban from my local Tennis Club. I went to the opticians today. It was a...
22:58 Sun 02nd Dec 20189 answers, last by marval 23:25 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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Patsy33

Left Me...

My girlfriend left me because she says I only ever think about football. I'm gutted, we'd been together for nearly three seasons....
20:13 Sun 02nd Dec 201830 answers, last by Ahimanshukhaira 10:12 Wed 05th Dec 2018
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kvalidir

Irish Sausages

Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'racism' these days. A customer asked, "In what aisle could I find the Irish sausages?" The assistant asks, "Are you Irish?" The guy, clearly offended,...
11:23 Sun 02nd Dec 201813 answers, last by hereIam 17:50 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Got An E-Mail Today.....

Got an e-mail today from a "bored housewife 32, looking for some action!" I've sent her my ironing, that'll keep her busy!...
12:57 Sun 02nd Dec 20187 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 16:32 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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Patsy33

Why Did..

Why did Bach have so many children? He did not have a stop on his organ...
18:15 Wed 28th Nov 201826 answers, last by Patsy33 17:09 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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sunny-dave

Alternative Elf On A Shelf Thread

I'm sure all the parents/grandparents on here are busy elfing ... ... but for those ladies who have a spare moment ... https://i.postimg.cc/G2RCkGth/hardy.jpg Anyone got any other suggestions?...
19:26 Sat 01st Dec 201854 answers, last by retrocop 14:01 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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bhg481

Irish Bank Robber

kvalidir's excellent Irish sausages joke reminds me of the failed Irish bank robber. He had a very broad accent and every time he went into a bank and shouted "Stick 'em up" the teller would double up...
11:55 Sun 02nd Dec 20187 answers, last by marval 16:42 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Dropped My Viagra Tablets...

I've just accidentally dropped all my viagra tablets on the floor after taking one. I'm on all fives on the floor at the moment trying to pick them up!...
19:58 Sat 01st Dec 20188 answers, last by petermic12 12:36 Sat 18th Sep 2021
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canlock

Sports And Games

A newly tailless blind rodent is upset , of course 4 Sort this game out, using scales or balance 8...
18:51 Sat 01st Dec 201810 answers, last by scorpiojo 19:32 Sun 02nd Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Stopped By A Police Officer!

The police stop an old guy in questionable condition at 1 am. “What are you doing out so late, sir?” asks the police officer. “I’m going to a seminar on ‘The harmful effects of...
16:48 Thu 29th Nov 20185 answers, last by sakshirathor12 12:32 Sat 01st Dec 2018
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BANANASPLITS

Salad For Lunch..

I think that the wife is doing a salad for lunch...either that or the smoke detector needs a new battery ;-)
13:11 Thu 29th Nov 201812 answers, last by sakshirathor12 12:32 Sat 01st Dec 2018
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Nameless14

Do You Give Money To Beggars?

Why/why not?
11:46 Tue 27th Nov 201831 answers, last by naomi24 13:40 Thu 29th Nov 2018
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Patsy33

Scott Sterling (Penalty Shoot Outs)

Spoof! https://youtu.be/8F9jXYOH2c0...
12:43 Thu 29th Nov 20186 answers, last by Ken4155 18:14 Thu 29th Nov 2018
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Caran

Is This A Scam?

Had an email saying I had bought something on an app. It was $30.99 and it as some chocolate type money. There was a link to say click on this if you didn't buy I think so I did. Asked for my details,...
11:23 Thu 29th Nov 20187 answers, last by BANANASPLITS 12:32 Thu 29th Nov 2018
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murraymints

Happy Birthday 1Ozzy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqQQaZrI7y8&app=desktop Happy happy birthday dearest friend xx...
05:46 Thu 29th Nov 201831 answers, last by 1ozzy 22:24 Thu 29th Nov 2018
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-Talbot-

Lol Lol

LABOUR MP David Lammy has been named politician of the year at this year’s GQ awards....
10:29 Thu 29th Nov 201816 answers, last by Mamyalynne 16:18 Thu 29th Nov 2018

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