.... to which the teller replied, "I beg your pardon, what did you say?" "Listen up, damn it! I said I want to open a f***ing bank account, right now!" "Sir, I'm sorry, but we don't tolerate that kind...
I've kind of left it to the last minute, but need to know if there's anywhere close to Gatwick that I can park, cheaply? I was supposed to be getting a coach, but just been informed it's no longer...
Anyone else remember this series which ran for some 15 years? I have just listened to an episode on Radio4 Extra - Comedy Controller, hosted by Roy Plomley with the original team: Eleanor Somerfield,...
A young, lonely bloke driving across the country decided to pick up a stunning, blonde hitchhiker. A few miles into the journey , the blonde started coming onto him, so needless to say, he pulled over...
Why are there so many trucks/lorries with red/green livery? I don't mean Eddie Stobbart. I mean the traditional local tipper, haulage and farm trucks. Many of them seem to have a dark red...
♫ Moony, Moony, Moony ♫ I work all night, I work all day, to pay the bills I have to pay Ain't it sad And still there never seems to be a single penny left for me That's too bad In my dreams I...
Just heard that Clive Dunn has passed away. That is so sad. Dad's Army was part of my childhood, and 'Don't Panic!' a favourite catchphrase. Sad, sad, sad.
Good day! You may have noticed that the Jokes section can now hold its head high as a top-level topic (rather than being hidden amongst then skirts of Phrases & Sayings). To celebrate, here's a...
Brock paid a visit last night and dug no fewer than 13 bloody holes in the front lawn. Looked a real mess this morning. Never mind - nature is wonderful ;)
I went to the doctor and said : "Every time I drink a French aniseed liqueur I break wind so loudly it sounds like a motorbike is passing" He simply replied : "Absinthe makes the fart...
Calling Moonraker54 - where are you? (see what I did then?) I really hope that Mrs Moony has got you some nice presents - a new razor, a clean vest, a barber's appointment - that sort of thing. Enjoy...
she was featured recently on BGT i think. She is the 13 year old who either won, or was on another talent show possibly american idol, If anyone did see her, were you impressed or not quite sure if...
We bought some from £1 shop. Minimal instructions on the box and only one out of the four work. This may sound daft but should the lights be fully charged [with the lights switched off for the...