Not One Girl Could Be Shown To Her...
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Growing Old Gracefully
There's a mole on my neck that's growing a hair
When I was younger it wasn't there
A lot of things changed since I've grown older
like my fallen arches and this hump on my shoulder
Yesterday I noticed a twitch in one eye
and spots on my hand that resemble a fly
I used to be able to party all night
but now to stay awake until five is a fight
My breasts used to be firm and quite pert
Now I have to be careful they don't drag in the dirt
Gravity surely has taken its toll
What was once on the surface is now in a hole
The backs of my arms are wobbly like jelly
and I found the remote tucked under my belly
I used to eat steak but now I can't chew it
Growing old gracefully. I don't think I can do it
I'm going to enjoy those poems gessoo - love Grannie's Trannie
extract....
Since Grannie tuned her trannie to a wee small hours D.J.,
She's learning, on an average, six new words a day!
When she used her new found knowledge to express her point of view
The pot plants all keeled over and the atmosphere burned blue!........
My 70yrs+ neighbour's the same with channel five.....
Have a good time Jude
.....mmmm there goes a Biddy with a social life......
I'll bet Vinny has rigged up a device to let him know when it's nearly post no 1000......we could let him have the honour just as long as he's very nice to us, doesn't sing any Petula songs, cleans the lav, picks up his empty tinnies, puts out the rubbish, & brings us all chocs and flowers......takes us shopping.....fits me a new kitchen light......no, second thoughts, no electrics....
Whooosh>>>>>>>>>Flings lotto ticket across room.
He He...love the poems gessoo...
Codgering
I wake up each morning, scratch my ass and head,
Then read the day's obits to see if I'm dead,
And seeing I'm not I get up for a piddle,
Then crawl back in bed where I diddle a little.
At six I make coffee and drink it down black,
And eat me some toast, without teeth I just smack.
I turn on the TV, tune in to 'Today'
And watch that cute Katie, she'd make a great lay
(:)
Thats brill shaney...
Now I'm old and feeble,
And my pilot light is out,
What used to be my sex appeal
Is now my water spout.
'Twas a time, when of it's own accord
From my trousers it would spring,
But now I have a part time job
To find the blasted thing.
I used to be embarrased
To make that thing behave,
For every single morning
It would stand and watch me shave.
But as old age approaches
It sure gives me the blues,
To see it hang it's withered head
And watch me tie my shoes
( :)