Body & Soul0 min ago
school poem
7 Answers
at primary school [too long ago] we had to learn a poem for prize day. Bizarrely I can only remember it was about a boy called John, and the last line was 'His Aunt, His Honour & His sponge!' Any ideas it's really bugging me, trying to encourage daughter with her rhymes & homework thought this'd be a good idea. Ta ;+)
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.Broad is the gate and wide the path
That leads man to his daily bath;
But ere you spend the shining hour
With sponge and spray, with sluice and show'r,
With all that teaches you to dread
The bath as little as your bed;
Remember, whosoe'er you be
To shut the door and turn the key.
I had a friend a friend no more;
Who failed to bolt the bathroom door.
A maiden aunt of his, one day,
Walked in as half submerged he lay,
But did not notice nephew John
And turned the boiling water on!
He had no time, or even scope,
To camouflage himself with scope,
But gave a yell, and flung aside
The sponge 'neath which he sought to hide;
It fell to earth I know not where.
He beat his breast in deep despair,
And then, like Venus from the foam,
Sprang into view and made for home.
His aunt fell fainting to the ground.
Alas! They never brought her round.
She died intestate in her prime,
The victim of another's crime,
And John can never quite forget
How, by a breach of etiquette,
He lost at one fell swoop (or plunge)
His aunt, his honour and his sponge.
Harry Graham
That leads man to his daily bath;
But ere you spend the shining hour
With sponge and spray, with sluice and show'r,
With all that teaches you to dread
The bath as little as your bed;
Remember, whosoe'er you be
To shut the door and turn the key.
I had a friend a friend no more;
Who failed to bolt the bathroom door.
A maiden aunt of his, one day,
Walked in as half submerged he lay,
But did not notice nephew John
And turned the boiling water on!
He had no time, or even scope,
To camouflage himself with scope,
But gave a yell, and flung aside
The sponge 'neath which he sought to hide;
It fell to earth I know not where.
He beat his breast in deep despair,
And then, like Venus from the foam,
Sprang into view and made for home.
His aunt fell fainting to the ground.
Alas! They never brought her round.
She died intestate in her prime,
The victim of another's crime,
And John can never quite forget
How, by a breach of etiquette,
He lost at one fell swoop (or plunge)
His aunt, his honour and his sponge.
Harry Graham
I have the 1920s book that this was in, and notice a few wrong words in the version posted above (in particular the important soap is missing!).
Here's my book's version:
Broad is the Gate and wide the Path
That leads man to his daily bath;
But ere you spend the shining hour
With sponge and spray, with sluice and show'r -
With all that teaches you to dread
The bath as little as your bed -
Remember, wheresoe'er you be
To shut the door and turn the key !
I had a friend - my friend no more ! -
Who failed to bolt his bathroom door ;
A maiden aunt of his, one day,
Walked in, as half submerged he lay !
She did not notice nephew John,
And turned the boiling water on !
He had no time, or even scope,
To camouflage himself with soap,
But gave a yell, and flung aside
The sponge 'neath which he sought to hide !
It fell to earth I know not where !
He beat his breast in his despair,
And then, like Venus from the foam,
Sprang into view, and made for home !
His aunt fell fainting to the ground !
Alas! they never brought her round !
She died intestate in her prime,
The victim of another's crime;
And John can never quite forget
How, by a breach of etiquette,
He lost, at one fell swoop (or plunge)
His aunt, his honour and his sponge !
Here's my book's version:
Broad is the Gate and wide the Path
That leads man to his daily bath;
But ere you spend the shining hour
With sponge and spray, with sluice and show'r -
With all that teaches you to dread
The bath as little as your bed -
Remember, wheresoe'er you be
To shut the door and turn the key !
I had a friend - my friend no more ! -
Who failed to bolt his bathroom door ;
A maiden aunt of his, one day,
Walked in, as half submerged he lay !
She did not notice nephew John,
And turned the boiling water on !
He had no time, or even scope,
To camouflage himself with soap,
But gave a yell, and flung aside
The sponge 'neath which he sought to hide !
It fell to earth I know not where !
He beat his breast in his despair,
And then, like Venus from the foam,
Sprang into view, and made for home !
His aunt fell fainting to the ground !
Alas! they never brought her round !
She died intestate in her prime,
The victim of another's crime;
And John can never quite forget
How, by a breach of etiquette,
He lost, at one fell swoop (or plunge)
His aunt, his honour and his sponge !