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My neighbour is at her wits end.------

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brenda | 18:43 Sun 23rd Oct 2011 | Health & Fitness
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Her mother is in a care home. I visit another resident in the care home and have seen the situatiion she is concerned about first hand.
Her Mother is 91 years of age , quite frail and not able to move unaided, she also has serious dementia.
The problem is that about 3-30pm in the afternoon the old lady begins to vocalise at volume , non stop. This constant noise which is very loud , drowns out the Tv and winds up other residents and their visitors.
The staff from time to time speak to her, and for a moment she is quiet.Other residents sitting by her , threaten to hit her ,and the male residents shout at her and swear at her.
The staff sometimes take her away to her room where she sits on the bed and sobs.Or they move her to another part of the room away from the group and again she sobs.
My neighbour thinks the vocalisation is due to boredom and frustration, and she may well be right.
So my question on her behalf( my neighbour) is this------Is there anything that anyone can think of which might occupy this old lady and keep her focussed for a short while and hopefully silent?
She has good manipulative skills and flexible fingers eg can hold a cup and saucer, and pick up small objects, her vision is also good.
Any ideas would be very welcome.Thank you in advance Brenda
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brenda, so are they asking your neighbour to come up with a solution then?
19:11 Sun 23rd Oct 2011
Could the home arrange something with local voluntary groups or similar? There may be some checks which would need to be put into place - I needed them when I volunteered at a local hospice but not for other work at a centre for the disabled, local deaf groups, assisting a blind student, Women's Aid etc... - might be different now though.

Maybe they could get volunteers to go in and keep her company or provide more activities on weekends.
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I am sorry I have to take a break here to take the dog out and stuff but will return later today Thank you all so much, so far for all your kindness.Brenda.
brenda - I know exactly how your neighbour feels. The first Care Home my Mum was in were always on the phone to me, 'she has done this, she has done that' and also when I visited, I was pulled into the office, and told various things. A bit like being called into the head teacher's office.

There were not enough staff to deal with the situation, so they turn to the family to come up with a solution.

I eventually moved my Mum to another Care Home, as she was also being physically abused.

Your neighbour is paying a pretty penny for her Mum's care and welfare, so I would put the ball back in their court, and ask what they would like your neighbour to actually do to resolve her Mum's boredom. Put the ball back in their court.
-- answer removed --
^^^ ditto^^^
... and ditto from me ^^^ I heard a presentation recently about dementia, and how the carers should be putting themselves in the patient's position and not seeing the situation only from their viewpoint. This is not personalised care - I'm sad to hear about this.
I agree with Eddie, I also work in a severe dementia unit, it sound like the home needs to be getting their act together.

You could also ask for a visit from the CPN. (Community psychiatric Nurse) they will also make recommendations on how best to manage her care, this will sometimes include medication, don't be afraid of medication, it isn't like it used to be, they don't just sit their and dribble like the old days, some of our residents have had their quality of life greatly improved by medication, just by relieving their anxiety.
Brenda would she be up to doing a jigsaw puzzle do you think, maybe one with large pieces if she would have difficulty seeing an ordinary one? Perhaps somebody could start her off and see how she goes. My lovely old gran used to spend hours getting great enjoyment out of them. I'm not suggesting this would solve the problem but might go a small way to alleviating it.
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ask your gran------Good idea, haven't got a bad voice myself so can and will giv e it a go when I am there-- and bugger what anyone thinks
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Towie --will get one of the photo thingys for my OH who is also in the same home in care, that's why I am there a lot.
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Eddies will bring my neighbour up to speed on the care plan--thanks
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Jenna will speak to the manager about the volunteer position--thanks
Has the home heard of "doll therapy"? I don't know much about this, but apparently if you give some people a doll to hold they immediately become a lot calmer. I'm sure there is more information on the net if you look. I worked in the office of a day centre and it did work well with one lady who had dementia. Good luck.
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TOWIE Thank you again for all your help -- I can tell that you are speaking from the heart.
Errm, and have you forgotten me brenda at 19.47?
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Boxtops and Ratter-- thank you both Will alert my neighbour to the roll of the CPN.
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Ladtbirder --would never knowing ly forget anyone and am just up to you I think . Love the jigsaw idea, will alert my neighbour , loads to try in the charity shops -- thank you so much.And please , hope you do not feel left out it was never in this world intentional Brenda.
Has the home heard of "doll therapy"? I don't know much about this, but apparently if you give some elderly people a doll to hold they immediately become a lot calmer. I'm sure there is more information on the net if you look. I worked in the office of a day centre and it did work well with one lady who had dementia. Good luck.
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tenrec -- like the doll idea will research for my neighbour thank you.
I expect I shall get over it ........................some day:-)

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My neighbour is at her wits end.------

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