Here I Know I Am Having A Bad Day But

[rowanwitch]

I wish the buzzard that has been circling the block would clear off. He's making me nervous.
Seriously been asleep most of the day, didn't want to be awake in a world without Dave. First time it's hit me like this, two months today. Seems like forever and no time at all. No sympathy required just saying....I will be back to happy and positive tomorrow I expect

[murraymints]

nearly 3 years since I lost dad..but still have days when I am consumed with grief and have a good blub...don't think the feeling of loss will ever go ..it's normal Rowan...

[rowanwitch]

That's brilliant, it's how I tried to explain what happens only so nicely put. Saying that I also used quantum theory to explain magic is possible. So I am definitely odd.

[rowanwitch]

What I am saying is I can't feel the loss, it's as if he wasn't there at all. And that is what is driving me a bit bonkers.

[murraymints]

that will come...

[jakep]

Rowan, you say that you cannot feel the loss but also that you do not want to be awake in a world without Dave.
Forgive me if I’ve got this totally wrong but I feel there is a part of you trying to protect your consciousness from the awful reality.
Not to lessen your situation at all but I am still having a bad time on and off after losing my beloved Labrador two years ago.
My very best wishes to you x

[rowanwitch]

Be easier to cry over a pet, I still miss all of mine, still dream about a couple. I think it's reverse my consciousness blocking my subconscious. I know he's gone, and I am aware of that in every plan I make that doesn't consider his needs, in every meal I cook that meets only my wishes. That I have sole control of the tv remote, and I can use the pc during the day now. I can sleep in our bed, not the spare room and the loo smells a lot nicer. ....

[woofgang]

yes you are right. its much easier to cry over lost pets

[ummmm]

I hope you're feeling better today, Rowan xx

[sadielady]

Rowan I hope you are having a better and more positive day x

[albaqwerty]

I like the phycisist's explanation.

I've read that grief is like standing with your bak to the sea. You never know when a wave will come and wash over you.

Hope today is better for you Rowan xx

[hereIam]

That is so true albs.

[rowanwitch]

Friend and I went out for a 'gentle stroll round a botanical garden's.' Out for five hours of which four were spent walking. We ended up doing a long walk along the canal as well. Total probably somewhere between 5 and 6 miles. But we did have cake. So a good day.