Is Being A Top In A Bdsm Relationship Really About Empowerment?

[rowanwitch]

Just thinking about this, a friend used to say she liked being dominant as she was able to work through a lot of bad stuff from her life She wouldn't switch roles because of early abuse but did say she enjoyed the responsibility for her partner. He used to say it was all about freedom, when you are completely disempowered in a safe space it is the nearest thing to total freedom. For me it was just a bit of a laugh between consenting adults. What do others think

[ummmm]

Rowan....I know but the fact that it can be paid for goes to show it's not that unusual.

[hereIam]

Yuk !

[nailit]

//Sounds like she was the one 'on top', Nailit?
Demanding?//
Mmmm, dont really know Spath. Just think she liked a bit of rough. Theres a bit more to it than just this but this is a family site ;-)

[kvalidir]

Kinbaku- now you're talking Spath :)

[kvalidir]

Ahhhh... interesting how this thread has brought out all the Kinks and all the Vanillas isn't it? As in life it's always the quiet ones :)

[rowanwitch]

The danger is a sudden loss of consciousness, you need to be very confident in your partner.

Still from the amount of beginners gear in Ann Summers it's becoming more mainstream. I did point out there was a problem with their paddle though. Having an uncovered edge it could break the skin which is not the point of a paddle. Dave pretended to be looking at something else.

[nailit]

//Ahhhh... interesting how this thread has brought out all the Kinks and all the Vanillas isn't it? As in life it's always the quiet ones :)//

[rowanwitch]

Or a ten flavour sundae with all the sauces and extra nuts

[nailit]

//extra nuts //
Are we talking about bringing another man into the relationship now?
;-)

[kvalidir]

Good shivvers or bad shivvers Spath? ;-)

[anneasquith]

By all means share your sexual preferences, but is AB the place ? We are often reminded it is a family site ?

[kvalidir]

No-one has been graphic Anne, this is Body and Soul, surely the place to discuss exactly that. there is nothing untoward being said, in fact I imagine quite a few of us have been very restrained in what we've discussed. Are you suggesting questions of a sexual nature shouldn't be addressed?

[anneasquith]

Very adult reply jim , thanks .