Just Need To Talk

[mallyh]

my son has been in prison again, where he got clean again ,he is now living on the street and back on heroine .I can't see any future for him and just waiting for the knock on the door .sorry to bore you with this again but I just want to get it off my chest as it is breaking my heart .

[mallyh]

he has had so many tries but they all failed .we put him in rehab twice .he has been on drugs since he was a teenager starting by smoking hash, then on his 21st birthday started heroine .I asked him why so many times.i'm hoping for the best but expecting the worst x

[mallyh]

putting someone in rehab cost so much and as pensioners we can't keep doing it ,we kept him for nigh on 20 years and had to finally say no more x

[Khandro]

He has to do it himself, sometimes by hitting rock bottom. There aren't many heroin addicts over the age of 40 they either give it up or, sadly O.D. as some friend's son has recently done.
It is terrible for you I know, such a waste of life, for nothing.

[Old_Geezer]

We're "listening".
Sorry, no solution.

[mallyh]

thankyou all for listening to me xx

[albaqwerty]

oh, mally (((hugs))) xx

He has a switch which flicks back on after rehabs and getting him away from places/situations/people which would flick his switch back on.

No matter how many times you are told that it's nothing to do with his upbringing or anything like that, please, please, please believe them.

Everyone has done their utmost, several times over, and willingly and with love.

Please look after yourself and Mr Mally xxxx

[mallyh]

thankyou ,we do try to step back but its so hard x

[MargoTester]

Mally I'm so sorry to read this and can only try to imagine what you and you're family are going through xxx

[mallyh]

thankyou I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy x

[-SharonA-]

Mallyh, I am so so sorry to hear this. Very upsetting to speak about, but do remember everybody is here for you on CB. Xxxx

[marval]

Mallyh I am so sorry to hear this, you have done so much for him. Unfortunately now, he is the only one who can change.

Please know that you both have done your best.

Come and talk on here whenever you want, there is always someone to listen.

My prayers and thoughts are with you all. xx

[wolf63]

mally - my mum told me many years ago that there is nothing worse than your children dying before you, I think that there is, he is your son and you love him but you don't like what he has become.

I wish there was a solution - it's easy to say that he wants to change, but when your brain is actually your worse enemy it isn't so simple.
x

[ladybirder]

Wolf I think your mother was right.

Mally, there is nothing I can say to you that will make you feel better in your despair. It must be a nightmare every waking moment and by what I can make out it has been going on for years. There is a glimmer of hope and you have to hang on to that which I'm sure you are. Take comfort where you can. I wish you and your family strength to deal with what life has thrown at you. xx

[pastafreak]

Mally, my heart goes out to you. It is unfortunate that you have tried so hard to protect and help your son, yet he is still so, so vulnerable. All you can do us always be there...in the background if need be. Do not judge him, and do not blame yourselves. His addiction is, sadly, much stronger than the help you offer. Rehab will only work when he is ready...and there are enough agencies to offer that support when he gets to that point.
I work in a drop-in where the average age of our clients is getting progressively younger each year. Many have very bad "habits". I see them,and always hope their families have not given up.

[hereIam]

Always hard for the loving parents. Be rest assured you have done all you can mally. I'm so sorry for you and your husband xx

[gness]

Mally....I am so very sorry to read this. You’re doing your best and more but it is time to put yourself and Mr Mally first though I know that will be so hard. We always want to help our children but there comes a time...... Love Gx

[saintpeter48]

Take consolation that you have done all in your power to help him, as I expect have others, but at the end of the day you cannot help those who can't help themselves.
Good luck in the future.

[TonyV]

Mally my simpatshy is with you I had to go into Leicester today, so many beggars and people sleeping rough. I offer a sandwich and a tea or coffee, but they want cash.

[tiggerblue10]

Sorry to hear this Mallyh. Don't know what to say except that I hope he sees the effect this is having on you and sees a way out of this nightmare.

[TonyV]

Mally does your son want to get "clean" if so then the NHS can help with a few days in a clinic and some prescription drugs ongoing.