Hospital Bed At Home

[Thisoldbird]

It's looking like we may have to have a hospital bed at home when my husband is discharged from hospital.

We already changed from double to singles which is fine but they are both against a wall. Hospital bed will need to allow nurses/ carers to use both side of bed..our second very tiny bedroom is already crammed with other equipment he needs.

Before anyone down sizes make sure you keep this sort of situation in mind.
At this rate I'll be sleeping in the shed!!
I'm normally such an organised person I'm hating this disruption.
The other option is go into care. I really haven't the heart to do that to him. It's like turning someone out of there home.

This isnt a question just me rambling on a sleepless night of worry.

[Thisoldbird]

Thank you. I've had a dreadful afternoon, I've been so brave for everyone else I have declined offers of company today..just as well as many months of pent up emotions have exploded.
I'll be glad to get tomorrow over now. I miss him so so much. At this moment it feels like I have nothing else to go on for. I did as I promised him I'd do my best..I did..now I have nothing left. Our son and now my beloved husband..x

[choux]

Oh my dear sweet lady. May I be bold? Your posts on here have been the most wonderful personification of true love that lasted over 6 decades. The love that you and your beloved husband shared is an amazing story and one that not many others could have had for suc a long time.

No-one reading your posts could doubt how important you were to each other.

I have pieced together an impression of your "boy". I see him as a perfect gentleman ever thoughtful of your well-being, comfort and safety. You have confirmed that he had a great sense of fun and humour - a characteristic I greatly admire. Throughout life's ups and downs it must have been easier for you to cope with matters ably supported by him.

Life now is turned upside down for you and I can only imagine how difficult it is for you to manage on your own. I am sure he fought as hard as he did so not to leave you alone. You have shown incredible fortitude to cope as you have done and now you should be able to grieve in your own time. But I beg you not to turn every one away, we all need someone to turn to.

You have my prayers, best wishes and love. x

[ducksie]

TOB, those floodgates were due to open and maybe you needed to just be alone to let it happen, but you need people, now more than ever, don't isolate yourself, what you're feeling is natural (that said, I have never and will never be lucky enough to have the love you have had with your husband) it's natural to feel so alone and think there's nothing or no-one left, but there are people that love you and are caring about you and more than likely worrying right now, ring one of them and talk to them please xx my thoughts and prayers are always with you and I know it's going to be so much harder tomorrow but I will be thinking of you and pray you have the strength to see you through the day xx Ducks

[albaqwerty]

I wholeheartedly agree with Both Choux and Ducksie. We will be thinking of you tomorrow,as always,but tomorrow especially xx

[choux]

I have had a song going round in my head for some days now. When I was a young child we had a gramophone at home with the old 78's. There was one in particular I loved to play. Forgive me, dearest old bird, but I keep imagining your beloved singing it to you. I recall it was on the Brunswick label - the younger ones of your fan club won't know it - but I think you will remember Richard Tauber.

You are my heart's delight,
And where you are, I long to be
You make my darkness bright,
When like a star you shine on me
Shine, then, my whole life through
Your life divine bids me hope anew
That dreams of mine may at last come true
And I shall hear you whisper, "I love you".
In dreams when night is falling
I seem to hear you calling
For you have cast a net around me
And 'neath a magic spell hath bound me
Yours, yours alone
A wondrous air is your beautiful hair
Bright as a summer sky is the night in your eyes
Soft as a sparkling star is the warmth of my love

God bless. x

[ducksie]

That's lovely Choux - I hope it gives comfort to TOB xx

[choux]

I would love it to do that, ducksie. x

[Thisoldbird]

Aww that's so sweet..thank you.

I have to confess I was playing music this afternoon that set tears flowing.. we were both born in the 30s..he 32, me 38. Met in the 50s..we loved the Platters.. today I went to YouTube and played a few. 'Only You'
and 'When the twilight has gone'.

Pass the Kleenex. :(

I've taken paracetamol for back ache..hopefully they will aid my sleep for a few hours.. I'm hoping once tomorrow is over I'll settle and look forward and not back on the bad bits.. sweet dreams dear friends xx

[anneasquith]

My very best wishes that you get tomorrow over with .
A bit of rest tonight would be great. As always prayers . Anne .

[choux]

Richard Tauber v The Platters
(I look older than I am!)
Well at least I was in tune with you on music :)

I hope the paracetamols help to get you some sleep, my friend.
Night night x

[ducksie]

Sweet dreams TOB xx I hope the paracetamol works and helps you rest x

[jennyjoan]

I hope tomorrow goes well as "well" can be for you oldbird.

[choux]

Hello my friend. You see, you had the full complement yesterday evening and everyone is thinking of you and sending you prayers and best wishes to support you especially today. I hope you got some sleep and that the back ache responded to the pain relief. Will be checking in during the day, so feel free if you want to post. Otherwise I echo what jennyjoan said so succinctly. Love and prayers, as ever. (((HUG))). x

[ducksie]

Hello TOB xxx
I've been thinking about you as I went about my morning
Lit a virtual candle and I hope you will be with close friends and family today - you're in my prayers that you can keep your strength up and sure, if you fold, that's just ok too, don't try be strong for anyone. Take the hugs from the grandchildren. I see we are all thinking of you today, I hope you find strength in that alone, you have touched us all how your life has changed since your original question, God bless you today TOB xx
https://gratefulness.org/candle/single?id=3613810?searchterm=tob

[choux]

^ x

[Thisoldbird]

Yes your thoughts and prayers were invaluable today.
Not the best night but not surprising.
However today has been spent my my lovely family. Great grand children hugs are so comforting..

Is the afternoon went on I have started to feel a bit more relaxed and very tired.. hopefully it's a turning point now the Cremation is over.

It's going to take some getting used to being alone tho it is 3 months since the hospital admission that set the end of life care into motion.

Thank you all for every message. It's been a long sad journey but knowing others were behind me helped no end. Hugs..

[choux]

I am so relieved to read that you had company today, dear lady. You have been spared greater upset and anxiety by not attending a funeral but none here, I am sure, have not though of you and prayed for you and your beloved.

Perhaps you will get some sleep tonight for you must be truly exhausted. Hugs from the small children must have been so very welcome today, just as the boy welcomed them when the great grandchildren visited him.

Bless you for letting us know. x

[ducksie]

TOB - it was so thoughtful of you to log in here and let us know you got through the day with the help of your beloved great grandchildren. I think the days of the funeral, those loved and left behind do feel that sense of calm, so it is heartening to read you felt it and hopefully you will have a peaceful night sleep tonight. I had to look back up on your main post about the hospital bed and see the 3 months since you posted it, God help you, little did you know this would be the outcome so soon. You have lost your soulmate TOB but you will never be alone, he will always be in your heart, your dreams and memories and then you have your family and friends, you won't see it today or tomorrow, but you have more people in your life caring for you than you realise x
relax yourself this evening x sending you so much hugs - you are stronger than you give yourself credit I think x Ducks

[anneasquith]

Well, maybe one of the worst days of your life.
We are always thankful for family at sad times. I’ve heard of many people who have said they slept well after the funeral of a loved one.
Isn’t it great that you were with your life partner at the end, a great privilege, please take comfort in that . Best wishes and prayers as always . Anne .

[choux]

Night night, old bird. God bless. x