Update to a few weeks ago - boys night out.

[PinkFizz]

Im still shaking as I write this and I don't know what to do.You may remember I wrote about b/f having a night out with lads and staying in hotel,etc and was I being paranoid.Well I have just gone to file his credit card statement,and amongst the mounds of transactions there is the hotel for that night - not the one he said,not where he said,and for the most espensive suite,with a spa etc and now I want to throw up.

[redcrx]

I have no answers for you Pink. Terrible timing as youve got both children staying the weekend but I really hope you manage to get through the weekend without it all blowing up.
Sending you huge (((((hugs)))))) and calming thoughts until it can all be settled.

[mccfluff]

awww pink, i really feel for you, is there anyway you can speak to him this morning? big hugs xx

[kazza12345]

there could be a reasonable explanation as to why he lied. I saw these really nice slate place settings the other day, but lied to mr kazza aboiut how much they cost because we are saving up and i knew he'd be cross

[nat_84]

Eric mates a extremely valid point....

Hotels usually need a deposit of at least �100.......

[kazza12345]

plus, i don't know where you live, but 100 pounds hardly seems the height of luxury - even if you stay in a travelodge and the room is 45 pounds, once you add on another 30 quid for breakfast for three then its expensive

[PinkFizz]

the whole evening was one big lie.He is new there and barely knows them. infact its a joke between us that his workmates are miserable sods.Then out of the blue that week he said the whole dept was going for a drink to thank them over work,and they invited his along.No way would it be a luxury suite with people he doesnt know.I want this all to go away - wish I had never seen the damn statement.

[Octavius]

So this means what exactly?

That he stayed in a better hotel with a nice room, and you deduce that therefore there must be another woman? Guilty before proven innocent?

If I am required to stay at a hotel because of work or a workfunction, I always aim for the bestest suite as I can have a nice top notch room to muyself and claim it back on expenses. Don't be ready to castrate him too quickly.

[PinkFizz]

for gods sake Octavius!!! He has lied about the entire evening from before he went out until now!!

[mccfluff]

could it be this was the hotel they were org staying at and they charged the deposit anyway?, ring them and find out

[PinkFizz]

I have rang the hotel - he booked a double room in his name.He told me that work booked and he gave them the cash

[mccfluff]

sorry meant to add ring them, tell them your reconciling your boss cc statement but don't have an invoice to go with the charge, could they fax it over

[Wee Kaz]

Pink, once again, you have to speak to him. Yes, you are angry and it perhaps doesn't look too good at the moment but you need to speak to him calmly and hear him out first and see what he has to say. If you can't see him face to face, I personally don't think the phone is a good idea as you will go on accusing him almost and if he hangs the phone up on you, you'll be even more distraught. You need to calm down first and foremost.

[fms]

pinky you must ring him pleease!!

[4getmenot]

Bless ya pink but you seem to have made your own mind up so maybe theres no point you even asking him and I think the whole issues you've had with past boyfriends doesnt make this any easier for you. what will you do if he says ok yer I did lie and stay in another hotel?

[redcrx]

It is sounding very incriminating but everyones just trying to keep you calm by saying it may be innocent (it could be).
Its obviously not working and youre far from keeping calm. Phone him and ask him outright where he stayed that night

[fms]

if he is a liar then yr better off without the guy anyway pink

[Octavius]

Sorry PunkFuzz, I was replying to your original question, I hadn't seen your 4th post with more explanation.

[~Wingnut~]

Hi Pink!

Oh dear, I don't know what to say as everyone else have really said it all.
Maybe he decided to treat himself? Could it have been the other men were teasing him about you checking up on where he was staying etc.. and to prove that wasn't true he went against you and booked a higher priced suite? a macho type thing.
I would get him to come home now and discuss it. Tell him you have his credit card bill, you have proof he lied to you that night and that if he cared about you at all he would come home now so that it can be sorted and not leave you thinking all sorts. Force him to put himself in your shoes too, tell him what would he think if it was the other way round?
I feel for you Pink, that sick feeling is so terrible. Good luck.

[PinkFizz]

Its not the fact that he chose to stay at a nice hotel - its the fact that he has always said to me that he cannot tolerate liars,yet he has lied about.
1.where he stayed
2.what it cost
3.who paid
4.where they went.

I asked him outright when he got back wher he stayed and it wasnt this place,or anywhere near it.I cant ring him at work as he couldnt possibly talk.

[kazza12345]

To be honest people who snoop or eavesdrop never find out anything to their advantage. If i was your boyfriend i would be pretty peeveed that A) yoiu had to know where iwas exactly and what it cost all the time b) you didnt trust me and c) i couldn't trust you - you say yourself that the transaction was right in the middle of loads of others, meaning its not like you "accidentally" saw it whilst innocently filing the statement, but that you were actively checking up on him - even so far as to phone the hotel to get more details. If he isn't seeing someone else then i think your relationship is over anyway