Cheap

[4getmenot]

Following on from this post

http://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/Body-and-Soul/R elationships-and-Dating/Question452331.html

If you have a one night stand does that make you cheap?

[alijangra]

Because they obviously have no respect for their own body, to let a stranger have sex with them.

[Sasha13]

If that's your only objection to it, I think it's a little strange. After all, how many people say to their partners (even if they've known them a long time), 'by the way, before we sleep together do you have craps or herpes or anything else I should know about?'

[alijangra]

The promiscuity in this country is quite sickening, and unfortunately it is young women who are getting worse. The rise in STD's in this country is alarming.

[Sasha13]

And, in response to your second post why does having sex with someone mean that you don't 'respect your own body' - in fact, I don't even know what 'respect your own body means'

Do people who drink or smoke disrespect their own body? How about people that eat junk food, or use chemicals like shampoo and make up?

I'm not trying to be difficult or argumentative, I'm just not sure what you mean?

[alijangra]

I have had 3 partners and each one has had an STD test before sleeping with me, and I also had one. Try working in an STD clinic, it might open your eyes. BTW many STDs are symptomless so anyone who sleeps around should really consider getting tested.

[Sasha13]

The promiscuity in this country is quite sickening, and unfortunately it is young women who are getting worse. The rise in STD's in this country is alarming.


That didn't answer my question - are the risks of getting an STD really reduced by waiting a few weeks to sleep with someone? Does waiting mean that you automatically ask your partner if they have an STD? I'm not sure that it does.

[Sasha13]

then, alijangra - I think you're very unusual, but good for you.

I'm well aware that many STD's are symptomless but what do you class as sleeping around? Number of partners, or speed with which you sleep with them?

I've already said on this thread that I've had one night stands in the past, but that I 've probably slept with far fewer people than most people my age - does that mean I sleep around?

[alijangra]

You obviously disagree with me sasha, which is fine. That is just my moral stance, I feel promiscuity is disgusting and spreads disease. I could just never bring myself to get naked with a stranger, condom or no condom. Im sorry if you find that wierd or think Im a prude.

[4getmenot]

I dont think you can actually say its women that are getting worse. You can have your opinion though about the respect thing. So anyone that has sex with someone doesnt respect their body. What about people trying for babies etc. can understand stranger statement as bit icky. You're right about symptonless STD's my mate went to have a test done and another mate got bit worried while listening to it all and got checked out and when the nurse said when was last time you had sex she said erm I havent :-)

[alijangra]

Yes but you nothing of that persons sexual history, so in effect you are sleeping with everyone he has slept with. How can you trust a man you have just met? They may be using prostitutes on a regular basis for all you know.

[4getmenot]

dont apologise for having a different opinion I love a good debate :-)

[Sasha13]

I really don't think that you're weird or a prude - and in some ways I'm playing devils advocate. I don't like the fact that lots of my friends feel that they need to sleep with boys to keep them interested or that they see each new partner as a conquest.

My point is this - if, when having a one night stand, you are careful and take precautions (which I know aren't 100% effective) I don't believe that you are at any more risk of an STD than if you wait however long and then sleep with someone.

In fact is it true that the longer you know someone the more tempted you may be to sleep with them without using condoms in the belief that you'll be ok, when the opposite may be true?

[alijangra]

4getmenot, I did not mean that anyone who has sex does not respect their bodies, I mean anyone who does it with strangers. I would only let a man I know and trust come near me, I have been with my partner for 7 years and have a great sex life!!!

[alijangra]

Sasha, that is why I would always recommend getting tested (both parties) before having sex. This is due to me spending time as a student nurse (a few years ago) in an STD clinic and some of the stories were heartbreaking. I value my health too much to take risks, no matter how much fun it might be.

[4getmenot]

good for you. xx

[legend758duo]

the strangest thing i read was when it was made out that you get less promiscuous as you get older due to wobbly bits etc.

you saying only the young beautiful people can give it away easily ?

then youre sadly mistaken .

it dont matter what you look like to some guys if youre an easy lay.

dont confuse that with liking you , loving you or respecting you.

its just sex .

[alijangra]

I also have a friend who is struggling to get pregnant, it has been suggested this may be due to a previous Chlamydia infection, and a sister who had abnormal cervical cells probably due to HPV.

[Sasha13]

OK, let's say for a moment that every person in the country decided to get tested before they slept with a new partner.

Do you honestly think the NHS could keep up with the demand?

And (I'm not saying this as I don't think it could happen to me, I'm asking as a genuine question) what are the odds, statistically, that the next time I sleep with a new partner, and use a condom (correctly) that I'm going to contract an STD?

[alijangra]

Sorry I feel like Im going on a bit, but it is a subject I feel so strongly about and I think attitudes have to change before we can turn around this terrible trend of rising STDs, especially amongst young women. Rant over! LOL

[Sasha13]

Don't apolgise, this is one of the most sensible threads on AB for ages! And I (and not many other people) would say someone was 'going on' for expressing a perfectly valid, and popular, opinion!