nic...if you are a male, then you are lucky that you have accidentally dropped onto the one male ABer who is quite an expert and successful with the women. I am not boasting nic, but telling the truth. I could give you the names of at least six female ABers who would verify my claims.
First of all nic, think of pleasing her and your sex drive will follow. Nice meal and a bottle of wine, tell her how attractive she is (try not to laugh though) and make her feel that she is desirable and unique. Let her talk about herself and encourage this by asking questions and keeping her wine glass full.
Back to the room...don't sit down.....stand her against the wall and slowly undress her, being careful not to touch her breasts nipples or inner thighs. Talk all the time about how great she look in her underwear.
Nic...that is enough for your first lesson and you will find at this stage your sex drive will have returned.