need a little advice

[babylilo]

I was seeing this guy about a month ago... we had a bit of a pregnancy scare and he said he wanted to cool it off for a bit until we were sure i wasn't..... he had a bad experience last year which i fully understood... anyways everything was cleared up and i wasn't pregnant which i told him. i then asked if we were still cooling it off or what?. to this he asked me what i thought and i said well i don't know thats why i asked. He said we were really good friends and he didn't want to flump that up cause he hurts everyone. i said that i ddn't think he would hurt me and that i feel a bit confused cause he tells his best pal that he really likes me but says something different to me. he says that we should take it slow get to know eachother and see where it goes. i don't know what to do? he flirts all the time and stands really close when he is talking to which i have started to take a step back and i generally end up being really blunt. he says i am being mean but he can't expect to turn round and say we are really good friends and expect it to go back to the way it was when we were more than friends. I really don't get it... does he want more?

[babylilo]

how do i sort it?

[ganesh]

Sounds like a dick,dump him and move on (I know,very sympathetic,,aren't I?) It's just that you sound young and when you say "we had a pregancy scare and he said he wanted to cool off for a bit...." doesn't make him sound ,how shall I put it,very loving and supportive...

[bednobs]

any bloke that wants to back off the moment he thinks you may have got pregnant isn't worth the words you are typing, or the energy you are expending typing them

[Old_Geezer]

He seems unsure, but since he isn't committed, should you be risking pregnancy at all ? If you are taking it slow then leave off the sex. And if one can not expect it to be as it was before, then that suggests to me you are 'just' close friends, go find another if you want more.

[arwyn]

Taking it slow, getting to know each other first, see where it goes (his words).
should'nt this have all happened before sex? because that was all he was after (sorry to be blunt).
He needs to grow up a lot before you even thing of seeing him again.

[Sqad]

What IS the big deal?

Are you engaged? Do you intend to marry?

Do you enjoy sex with him?

Go along each day and see what transpires.

[arwyn]

When you meet another lad (after you ditch this childish one) make sure you do take it slow, do you really want a baby? because every time you have sex a baby could follow. Ask you'r self what would he have done if you were pregnant, he ran off at the thought of it.

[sandyRoe]

You've had a pregnancy scare and now you want to get to know him? In the olden days people got to know each other and then did the business that might have led to a scare.
O tempora! O mores!

[Sqad]

pinki


<<<<<He's happy to have sex with her, then blows cold (freezing!) when she says she might be pregnant. <<<<<

Seems to be a normal reaction in a "casual/ semicasual relationship, which is what it appears to be.

If they were engaged or were in a "meaningful " relationship, then I would agree.
Boy meets girl, they both enjoy good sex, he likes the sex but couldn´t marry her in a 1,000years.....happens all the time.

[McMouse]

Only advice I'd offer is to use contraception.

[Sqad]

pinki...LOL............obtained via gossip ;-)

[arwyn]

contraception and self respect.

[starone]

He wants the best of both, plenty of sex without any commitment. Get rid of him - there are plenty of nice young men around but get to know them first don't jump into bed as soon as you meet them.

[Sqad]

arwyn..........many people would gladly give up a bit of "self respect" for a little more sex.