Just want an ear, or maybe a few hundred.

[EvianBaby]

Guess this is probably the best place for this.

I don't think I've ever had a panic attack, until now I'm not even sure I believed they existed but I think I'm about to implode.

I've not been doing well since breaking up with my ex and our relationship has been really up and down since, fine with each other one day and doing our best to upset each other the next. I thought I was starting to feel better about things but since the start of the weekend I've been an emotional disaster. We ended up having a huge row yesterday so I've now deleted all his contact details from my phone but next month I've got my b.day, then xmas then new year and the thought of it all is making me utterly miserable. The thought of it all sets me off in tears and I feel like I can't get my breath. I've gone back to barely sleeping and when I do I have messed up dreams. On top of this I'm dreading going to work every day at the moment because it's such a nightmare. Every time the phone rings I just want to burst into tears but it's only a little company and the guys have no idea about how to do my job, although they do understand the difficulties at the moment. I'm trying to pretend to the family that I'm excited about xmas as they are all looking forward to it but I'm secretly dreading the next month, especially as last year was so good.

I know tomorrow I'll regret posting this but I've only really got one of my sisters I can talk to and she has so many of her own problems at the moment she doesn't need me banging on about this. Just wanted to get it out.

[joe_s_angel]

Hi Evian,

I feel so sorry for you, I have been there. I dont want my words to seem like a cliche when i say i know how you feel, but i really do feel exactly the same. Believe it or not i have broken up recently too, my birthday is next month, and Christmas is my fav time of year. I have already been aching at this Christmas for a couple of weeks now, because i know how difficult it will be. May be the only differnce between your story and mine, is that my ex and I are giving each other other hard time ALL the time...since the break up.
I won't lie to you and tell you that i am following the advice i am about to give you, but i really believe it can work, ony if you want these days to pass smoothly. A very close friend of mine told me, that i won't be able to do that alone, i have to make use of my family and friends. Really use them, their support, their care. Dont be afraid or shy to ring a friend and even say i dont feel ok, or can i talk to you, or can i pass by and have a chat. Also try to make yourself busy, distract yourself, even with silly things...

I wish you go through this tough time peacefully.....