What would you do ?

[tamaris]

Met up with a school friend after many years of being out of touch. At first we were in touch a lot and I went to visit her for a week. I am finding her so unreliable at present, she has been saying she will call me for months and has not done so. Then if I do not contact her by email, she is eager to know if I am OK. It is doing my head in as I now remember that she was unreliable when we were at school, even though she is a lovely girl. It all seems a bit one sided, she does not make any effort to visit me. I am not sure what to do.

[tamaris]

That is what I am thinking Tabathazig

[ummmm]

Accept her for what she is. If you know she's unreliable don't rely on her. Doesn't mean you can't be friends...

[jno]

what ummmm said. Don't count on her for anything but enjoy her company and her correspondence when it happens. You don't have to dump her or anything unless you want to.

[237SJ]

When you leave school there is a reason why you keep in touch with certain friends and take them with you into your future life. There is also a reason why you lose touch with certain people and when you meet up with them in later life, you are reminded what that reason was.

[ummmm]

Have you actually invited her to visit you?

[tamaris]

Yes many times, when we were first to meet up, she never suggested coming to me or meeting in for example London, it was as if she expected me to go to her, which I did, then she said of others that if they wanted to see her, she was not travelling to them they would have to go to her.

[ummmm]

Some people are just like that.

[tamaris]

I guess I like people to meet me halfway, so to speak

[ummmm]

I understand that...but people are different. Personally, as I have my own strange ways, I tend to not analyse other people too much. You know where you stand with her, so it's up to you. If you want to go and see her, go and see her :-)

[boxtops]

..and if you don't, don't.