am i alone in feeling this ?

[GINGER BIRD]

I ve been with my other half now for 18 months and its going pretty well actually. However occasionally he talks about his ex . he does it matter of factly and isnt all lovey dovey about her in fact its far from it . i have exes and i dont talk about them but when he does it kind of irritates me and makes me wonder if i am second best. please help

[888sally888]

Well I would look at it as he is not hiding anything from you and at the end of the day she is an ex for a reason and he is with you for the right reasons!!

If he was saying wonderful things about her I would be a bit concerned but he isnt so dont worry.

Just enjoy being with him or play him at his own game and see how he reacts?!

[lou 26]

you should be upfront and honest and tell him you dont like it. Perhaps not in those words, lol. but honesty is the best policy and he may not even realise hes doing it. Everyones entitled to a past but thats exactly where it should stay. Dont think for one minute youre second best! if that were the case he'd still be with her and not you. good luck xx

[HJT40]

No, you're not alone.

I have an ex who would discuss his ex a lot, even down to her breast feeding their son!

You are not second best at all. Maybe he doesn't realise how sensitive you are about it, perhaps you should say but not make a big thing about it.

Like has been said before if he wanted to be with her he wouldn't be with you.

[888sally888]

I have to disagree Raggy - my husband is very jealous and I am not!

[wiggal]

My fella didnt ever talk about his ex, but his mum used to :(
She would often ask if my fella knew how his ex was doing (she fell pregnant with another mans baby whilst with my fella!) and would ask in front of me.
Also once when I was wearing odd socks she commented and said 'oh thats funny, Kate always used to wear odd socks too!' It was at that point that he told his mum never to mention her again, and luckily she hasnt!

I found it very hard at first though, when at his and there was still a mug with her name on and so on as they had lived together in the house we live in now.

I'd suggest either telling him how you feel, or play him at his own game and see how he reacts as has been said.

[mirela]

erm, my boyfriend mentions his ex gfs sometimes as well, but only bad things, so actually makes me feeling better.
i think you should talk to him and tell him how you feel, he might not realise when he is talking about his ex,then just wait and see if anything gonna change. if he respects you, he'd pay attention.

[banjobabe]

Yes,

REALLY good idea to start playing games.........


NOT

BB xx

[christina81]

I used to talk about my ex a lot but it werent because i wanted him back.We have kids together and we were together for almost 8yrs.I suppose its just hard not to because you were with them so long you did almost everything together so its a bit hard not to mention them.Also the fact that they irritate you so much you just have to let it out.

[ftj001]

Listen,

If you can see that he isn't lovey dovey about it ,let him get it out. He is probaly giving off hints of things he didn't like about her and he doesn't want you to be the same way. Let him get it out! But you let him know that it makes you uncomfortable