Someone must be able to help me!

[tamirra]

Im a 43 year old woman with two grown up children, the problem is my sex life with my husband, ive completely gone off sex years ago, i had a hysterectomy at the age of 25 since then my sex life has gone down hill gradually until now where it is non existant, i have been to the doctor had different h.r.t to try to help, implants, patches, gels spoken to the doctor and the nurse nobody can or wants to help and im so worried after 22 years of marriage that my husband is going to get so frustrated that he is going to wander, he says he never would but who knows when it gets so tough for them, i wouldnt blame him if he did and i probally wouldnt leave him if he did as i only have myself to blame. I have tried herbal products too but its just a waste of money, i really need help please someone must know of a pill or something that would, i never ever feel like it, i never think about it in which case i NEVER want it. Help me please. xxxxx

[justmetoo]

Lots of couples dont have a sex life for varios reasons, sex is not the b. all, but you must talk to your hubby, not all men would stray.....

[tamirra]

He would stray im sure if i dont get some help very soon he has suffered now for years and i cant expect him to suffer for years ahead too, would yours if you have one?

[justmetoo]

I do have a husband, we last had sex 10 years ago, for the same reson you have...

[tufty7]

Sorry situation for both of you , The emptiness of desire must be awful, however there is more to sex than intercourse, hand relief on your husband may well be sufficient along with a bit of whispering in the ear, if you can manage that , as for being mediteranean being highly sexed, its a falicy , Most men have desires all day long , its just the way we are wired up I am afraid.

[tamirra]

Well tufty he just must be highly sexed then, we have just had a discussion about it and he is very ****** off with me, very frustrated, and has said that he has had offers of sex but has turned them down, wouldnt blame him if he did go with who ever they are i would just rip there blood y heads off, ive told him im not going back to the doc as if there was a magic pill of potion i could have then they would have given me it, so he is going to see him ( he knows our gp) and ask him for the female viagra if there is one, i think there is, to see if it works, if not he did mention about me going to a chinese herbalist, whats your feelings on them? if you have one that is. xx

[irishmary]

hi Tamirra,I think you have just got out of the habit. Why not try playing with your husband (have a drink first if you feel shy )watch him undress try and stay lighthearted about it,stop worrying about having sex its a sure passion killer.
You can still please your husband without having sex,you are worrying about him,so once he is happy the rest will follow if not dont worry.

[tamirra]

Irishmary, watching him undress does nothing for me sexually at all, i would rather do the housework than have sex to be honest with you, yes your right there are other ways of pleasing him sexually but i cant get motivated to do any of them, if i could maybe just find a little tiny bit of passion inside me i could build on that, but ive got nothing there to work on anymore.

[gucciman]

id rather have a bj than full sex anyday so why not keep him happy with a bj a day !

[tamirra]

Yeah he does love them too says i blow his mind ( parden the punn ) but its still something sexual to me so it will take some time to get round to doing.