Coed bachelor party without bride

[harlowjane]

My fiance is having a bachelor party a couple of days before the wedding. His friends want to take him to play paintball and have a BBQ. I was even fine when he said that there would be a stripper (well, mostly fine, would rather there wasn't, but we have a strict hands off policy that I trust him to follow), but he also said that they were inviting several of his friends that are female, including an old girl friend! Am I wrong to be irritated that they are having a coed party and not inviting me? When it was a traditional men's only thing that was different, but my view point is that once it become co ed why would i not be invited? Thoughts?

[harlowjane]

Sorry, and just want to mention that I am expected to stay home with his parents (who I will meet the day before) and HIS 4 kids while he is at this party!

[siggsy]

You'll probably get loads of advice from more learned people than me - but .... I'd have a rethink kid!

[joeluke]

By Batchelor party do you mean a Stag Night?

[cherrychapstick]

just tell him you are having your hen night the same night but unlike him there will only be you and one other person an ex :)


more seriously i agree with siggsy ,but are you having a hen night at all?

[ummmm]

Are you American?

[joeluke]

From the name I'd guess English

[harlowjane]

I am American, he is from New Zealand, but we are living in Australia. I just moved her 1 month ago so don't have any friends here to have a Hen's night with. He doesn't see why I would have an issue...says that he wouldn't mind if i had a coed party because he trusts me. I tried to tell him that is has nothing to do with trust. I actually do trust him, just don't think that it is right for him to have a coed party that doesn't involve me. By the way, this is his second marriage, my first.

[siggsy]

I'm a bloke but not a very good one if I'm honest. Cherrychapstick is right (not just agreeing with me!) but I'd take it further and tell him there was a stripper at your hen night too - wonder which one of the two he'd be more upset at that being!!

[joeluke]

Not sure how things work over in NZ, but at stag nights I've been to over here anything goes

[ummmm]

She just said she doesn't have friends yet.....

I don't understand the coed stuff Harlow..

[ummmm]

Joe....you have a real nasty streak.

[harlowjane]

Don't understand it in what way?

[joeluke]

ummm.......ever been on a stag night?

[cherrychapstick]

how long has he been in Australia ? also how long have you been together ? sorry but in my opinion (maybe not a good one) if this is how he is treating you know i would have loads of concerns for the future with him ,why have you never met his parents before now,i am a little confused about that have you met his kids before now? and is the ex the kids mother?

[siggsy]

ummmm - he's getting ready for Saturday's match I think (given the SG flag) and Jane is American. Don't take it personal Jane but Joe is right (unfortunately) - get rid!

[cherrychapstick]

what is coed ? i think that is what we dont understand

[ummmm]

Yes I have actually. My best mate is a man...!!! Maybe we have higher standards than you....

Or, like Jackthehat says, pay more attention to my posts and you'd know.

[ummmm]

Something to do with school Cheery...I think..!!

[joeluke]

siggsy........how has this thread got anything to do with saturdays game????

All I'm trying to say is Stag nights/batchelor parties etc ain't a teddy boys picnic

Drunken debauchery and naked girls

Am i wrong?

[harlowjane]

I have actually known him for 17 years! LONG before he had kids.... We reconnected last year. No, the ex that will be there is not the kids mother. His friends hate her, they would never invite her... This one is just an ex girlfriend...nothing serious. I actually am fine with her in general, they are still friends and that isn't a problem. I know his kids well, so that isn't a problem. His parents still live in NZ. We have chatted and Skype'd just not met in person yet. I pretty much decided that if the party happens, I am just going to spend the day/night in Sydney. Check into an expensive hotel, do some shopping, get a massage... not sticking around with the family. In his defense, he did offer to cancel it or tell them that I was coming. My issue with that is that makes me either the wench that wouldn't let him have the party, or the suffocating wench who wouldn't let him play without me....