Suspected cheating

[efences]

Hi Guys,

I have a feeling my wife may be having an affair. Shes secretive with Facebook and her phone. I found a mobile phone number written down which I know i wasnt meant to see.

Is there anyway of checking if that number has been used? Either as a call or text?

Im so gutted but dont want to confront her til i have solid evidence.

I dont know her online account password or username for her phone bill. And i doubt T Mobile will disclose that info

Please help.

Thank you in advance.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

[ummmm]

Why don't you phone the number?

[efences]

I have tried. Automated voicemail.

[ummmm]

What does she do with her phone that makes you suspicious?

I've been in this situation...

[jackthehat]

Drop it or ask her.
You'll drive yourself mad with all this 'secret squirrel' stuff............

[efences]

Whenever she gets a text, she doesnt look at it til i move away from her. Sometimes i can see the glow of her phone light up (as it does when you get a text) and she glances at the light so shes alerted to the fact shes got one. Also phone on silent.

I ask, but she says its her friends or sister. Thats why i just wanna know if the number i found has been used.

[milly143]

How do you know you weren't mean to see the number?

Sometimes things can appear to be more than they are. I once suspected b/f of being up to something as he put a pin on his phone and it was either alway in his pocket or he didn't bring it with him. I found out the pin once so looked at it and all I found was a a bunch of texts about football and calls to me, his mum, his mates, etc. I asked him why he put a pin on and was reminded of the fact his other phone got nicked and he got rinsed on the bill.

[mrs_overall]

Can you get your hands on the phone?
If she takes it in the loo with her, ask her why

[milly143]

The phone on silent thing is nothing. Mine is on silent all the time because the sound of it going off drives me nuts and is annoying to other people.

[efences]

It was written on a piece of paper that i found in her jeans pocket when i went to do the washing. Ok, it may be nothing but i've always been open about texts i get. She never used to be secretive.

[mazie]

Is she was cheating would she put herself under suspicion by leaving her phone switched on when you were around? I dont think I would.
I agree with JtH, talk to her about it and tell her your fears.

[Sqad]

LOL

[Ankou]

i would go with jth. how long has this been going on ?

[efences]

About a month.

[jackthehat]

Have you considered other options ?

Birthday ?
Anniversary ?

[Ankou]

jeepers man, ask her.

[ummmm]

I'd be suspicious. My ex use to leave his phone in the car...by accident of course.

I think if you're not a jealous or suspicious person by nature...you're instincts tend to be right.

[Nosha123]

if there is a genuine change in her behaviour then maybe you have some grounds for suspicion....

However you cannot accuse without any evidence....

You could bluff her - by saying (with a stoney face) "I know"... "I know all about it"... I want you to be honest with me now and tell me why? I dont understand what I have done wrong and why you would do this to me etc etc


Keep it non-descript... then she may 'fess' up to something!!

[MarkRae]

I think you might be jumping to conclusions a bit here...

If the number that she supposedly "arranged" for you to find really is of another man, what do you suppose she expected you to do with it? Ring him up and confront him? Surely if she wanted you to find out, she'd just tell you...

If she is having an affair and doesn't want you to find out, why would she allow him to text her when he knows she's at home with you...?

[ummmm]

Nice response Sqad...!

I did think about the birthday, anniversary thing...but you'd tell people not to contact you at certain times.