Love online

[Teddy_boy]

I have joined many online sites to find a partner. But personally i find that at 51 years old and after a divorce a few years back , its very diffficult to form a lasting relationship. Many of the women i have met are so busy in their own working life that they are only looking for casual encounters. Call me old fashioned but i set out looking for love and as of yet after 6 months im no nearer. Yes i have been intimate with women.And found it very enjoyable. But im starting to think that either the women dont want to commit and then change their current lifestyle , or perhaps im only good enough for some casual meeting and im not worthy of a commitment from them. Im starting to feel cheap.When im alone i cry , and i know man shouldnt do this, but i feel like my life is empty.I have nothing and im just living day to day.Its like life is passing me by.I feel unwanted and surplus.People i work with think im a happy jolly guy , but really im very sad.Sometimes i go to bed and think that if i never wakened then noone would even know.Or care. When all i really want is a nice woman to spend my time with and grow old with.But i just cant find them.Am i just undesireable ?

[Halifaxmum]

Being single is not a failure!

[Teddy_boy]

Nox thats very interesting and i will need to consider what youve posted in depth. Halifamum you are too nice. Nox what age group is acceptable for a man just starting into his 50s? Earlier posts i read made me feel a bit , well like they thought i was some dirty old man after 26 year olds.

[Halifaxmum]

teddy i'm not too nice!!!

you've got to stop thinking negative about yourself, if you have got love to give, that is the best thing ever, there is nothing to beat love, just hold it back for the right person... x

[Halifaxmum]

teddy - i got with my partner when i was 36 and she was 50 - it's not a problem at all - it's all about attitude and your hopes for the future - age means nothing

[Teddy_boy]

I think i may be frightened of love. Theres a sense of inevitability about failure. There was one woman who , well it could have been something fantastic but circumstances were against us. And i guess its all history , we dont even speak now. Thtas the strength of my animal magnetism. Sometimes i think theres no place for honesty , or loyalty , or even love , because its doomed to failure .

[Teddy_boy]

Love has become a stranger to me.

[Halifaxmum]

teddy - are you taking the Fosters?

[Teddy_boy]

No im just a bit down.Sorry.Time to go up the wooden hill.Goodnight and thank you for all the good advice .

[Halifaxmum]

ok teddy - sorry didn'y mean to disrespect you, sleep well x

[Teddy_boy]

And i probably shouldnt have had asmuch gin as ive had tonight. Thank you for all your lovely advice halifaxmum. goodnight.

[Halifaxmum]

listen, any time you need to talk, i will understand x

[NOX]

Seriously I honestly do think age is just a number and I wouldn't rule anyone out in the age range 18 to approaching 70 because we are all different. My ex mother in law is a wonderful woman whose married to a man 40 years younger than her, and he's not weird or a gold digger, he's a successful businessman whose considered attractive and affluent. My ex wife was 8 years younger than I was and we had a great relationship- and still do, as we're still friends.
I think the most important thing is not to place any constraints on who or where you find love- I'm nothing to write home about-I have a fairly difficult past- but I do honestly and earnestly believe that love is there for us all if we only find the right person, and that includes you. To allow yourself to be subject of the doubts you are is doing yourself a great diservice- you come across as being intelligent, witty and generally a nice guy. I've no idea what you look like but beauty is in the eye of the beholder- I have some seriously horrible scars on my body and learned years ago that they do not make who or what I am. When the right person comes along I'll know- and so will they just as when the right woman comes along for you, you will- it just takes a bit of looking the world is a very big place.

[NOX]

Night Teddy, I'll be back about tomorrow.

[Teddy_boy]

Thank you.But sometimes.not often.but sometimes.Well its got to end sometime so why not sooner than later ? Thank you for letting me bend your ear.What a sweet and caing person you mustbe .

[Halifaxmum]

Nox...i like your thinking

[Halifaxmum]

What do u mean teddy?

[NOX]

It took a bit of a rocky journey to get to how I think:)

[Teddy_boy]

Ive had more haertache then heartwarming times over the last 2 decades. but its got to end sometime i suppose

[Halifaxmum]

i know what you mean, but don't talk about it ending...x

[Teddy_boy]

I once met someone . FOR AN INSTANT. aND , WELL IT SEEMED , I DONT KNOW , BUT I THINK TH E gin is kikcing in and i must go to bed . But i want to thank everyone for their input irres-pective of what they said.