Moody 14 year olds : (

[curlyperm]

Hi, anyone else got one? or is it just me who cant say or do ANYTHING right?? i am begining to think my daughter has gone a bit deaf cos when i (have the bloody cheek to) enter her room to ask what she wants for tea, i get no response, or one of those drop dead looks! Can t for one minute imagine that i was like that with my mum and dad? When i look at gorgeous pictures knocking about when she was 4 or 5 i think ............................... sh*t where did it all go wrong?
Even if your offspring arent like this - can you please LIE just to make me feel its not just me Thanks x

[annie0000]

I wouldn't depair, i believe that most of them are like that if I go by what my friends at work say, apparantly you are the most embarrasing, evil person on earth who was only put here to spoil her life. I think they get over it at about 16/17 so enjoy the next few years! I have boys, so I am hoping is will be different. I think what we get is them locking themselves in their room and contemplating suicide for about 3 years. lol

[curlyperm]

well after asking 3 times 2 hours ago 'what do you want for your tea??????????? and getting zero response i thought right 'sod you' now she just came in the room 'well.....................................wheres my tea??' so just thrown a chilli together (felt like throwing it at her to be honest ; )
ah well, 3 years and counting grrrrrrr

[annie0000]

i am afraid that I wouldn't have been as generous as you, no reply = no dinner! I would have shown her the fridge. I am quite tough, my kids will vouch for that. Since they were little, if they leave the table, they will get one warning, leave again and the dinner is in the bin and they get nothing else until the next time that they would usually get something. I am not completely hard though, the meal that they get is always something that I know they like, I never give them something knowing they don't like it then deny them anything else - I wish I could it would save me running a cafe! lol

It only takes a few rumbling tummys to ensure that we get empty plates before wandering off. We have never quite mastered the "please may I leave the table" thing.

[Baby02]

Curly my daughter has just turned 16 I know exactly what ya mean! She went to bed an angel at 15 and the next morning a devil had replaced her!
Shes been like this for 10 months and it aint gettin any easier, plz dont think its just you... read what other parents are facing with there brats at the following link
Hope this helps
http://www.ivillage.co.uk/

[Solarjunkie]

Chin up!
In this particular instance, I suggest
a) knocking & not entering her room (sanctuary) until asked
b) asking if she'd like pasta or chili for tea
c) if no response, saying ok then it's chili
d) sorting out menus a day or even a week in advance
e) pre-arranging an evening when you cook chili together, for all the family, to rapturous approval!

[curlyperm]

lol solar!! can but try ; )

[Fairie]

I have a 13 year old son, he is the same, I agree with annie on the idea of just showing her the fridge, I say to mine "what do you want for dinner?" maybe twice and then I say "ok your not hungry, the rest of us are having ... you can help yourself later" then he will end up with micro chips and a rustler!! not the best of meals for a growing boy, but he cant be bothered making anything worth eating and at 10pm neither can i !!

The thing I have found to be interesting and helpful, which also proves we are not alone with our moody teens is parentlineplus they run a great telephone conference meeting for parents, i am currently joining the group called "dealing with anger" they last an hour and half once a week and each group meets on the phone for about 8 weeks.

On another note, i am sure it will pass, in a few years... until then grab the bull by the horns and try to enjoy the ride.

[MYSTERYT]

HI curlyperm WELCOME TO PARENT HOOD
I have a 16 year old girl and well where do we start ,All kids aged 11-18 are a pain in the posteria, they think they know it all (i dont think so ) most have an attitude , they seem to think they can treat you how they want to, speak to you like they speak to their friends etc well like i told my daughter 3 years ago ,leave the attitude outside the door (cause me and attitude aint friends) as for the looks (rolling of the eyes were her favorite) ignore them .
The classic one is when they have a crowd of there friends over , my daughter hates it if i go in her room when their all there , so i do just to annoy her and the worst thing is i get on really well with her friends, (so raspberries to her)
But on a serious note it does not last my daughter is coming out of it now( and thank the lord above she is cause ive got some serious grey hairs from it all )Ive got friends who have boy's of that age and be it girl or boy they all go through it , You just have to stay firm with them and if there rude to you ground them or take the mobile its there life line ,at this age never be there friend so to speak , but always be there for them i have and its worked for me ,ive got it again soon my boy's 9 at the mo ( i'll be snow white by then)
GOOD LUCK

[curlyperm]

hey mysteryt i wouldve given you 6 stars if i could and thanks to you and everyone else who replied mwa mwa xx

[spanner7853]

hahaah check out my smiliar post from March 27th I have a 13 year old that seems to have multi personality syndrome. One day she's lovely the next I could give her a good hiding. unfortunately I was like this from about 16 to 21 and although I know I was doing it I couldnt stop myself. They do get over it eventually. The trick is not to rise to it, although it's damned hard.

[emx384]

If it helps - am a teacher to this age group and the thing that brings the girls to my office in tears more than anything else is their guilty feeling about being such a cow to their mums the previous evening/weekend/morning - I tell them to apologise and make amends which they always say is impossible! They seem to lose this social skill as teenagers!!

Soooo - I think they are often more sorry than you think - but just cant/wont express it! Personally it took me until I was 25 until I was able to apologise to my mum for being such a B**** to her during my teenage years!!

[gina32]

i was also a bitch to my mum when i was in my teens, i would cross the road if i seen her, call her all the names under the sun, i would lead her a dogs life, she used to say you'll put me in a n early grave and you know what, i did, she was only 61 when she died and ive regretted my actions ever since and if i could turn the clock back i would.

[gina32]

my mum would do whatever she could for me, but i was never happy and thought she was the worst mum around and all my friends mums were better but of course my friends thought the same about their mums but of course they werent better then mine was, as the saying goes hindsight is a wonderful thing!!

[curlyperm]

oh gina, how sad that made me when i read your post! i think we are all guilty of being a cow to our parents in younger days, i know i was too, like you say...........hindsight is a wonderful thing. My daughter is not too bad i guess, but is happy to let me drop her off at school in the mornings to save her walking (15 mins max) but i cant drop her at the gate, god forbid anyone should see me!!!!! she would rather i was dressed to the nines with full bl**dy make up on, instead of my PJ's and tiger feet slippers, heheheheh i do that to wind her up! i always say to her, 'oh you'll be sorry when ive gone' and then she gets all upset and thinks i'm gonna die in a car crash? Kids eh?

[pinkgrl91]

your not doing anything wrong its todays society that makes us teens feel as if we need our privacy and make us push our parents away not only is it society but the changes we experience and the our influences liek friends and the stresses we go through. so basically shes just going through a normal phase keep doing what your doing eventually shell get over it and realize how lucky she is to have a mom liek u

[curlyperm]

well thanks for that pink! youve made me feel a whole lot better, cos the last 3 weeks ive sent her off to a hair salon to work and to gain a bit of confidence and self esteem, but youd think i was sending her down the mines!!!!! apparently NOBODY has a saturday job just her : ( lol
xx

[MYSTERYT]

Hi curly perm ,your daughter is lucky she has a saturday job my daughter cant even find one ,
Im sorry to say but if pinkgrl91 thinks that todays society is to blame for how kids are then all i can say is god help us all in 15 yrs time cause the way kids are nowdays is appauling they have no respect or manners for anyone not even themselves,and the only way it is going to change( in my opinion) is if the kids themselves change the way they are towards society, after all they seem to think that we owe them something and we dont ,We give birth to them ,we care for them when they are sick ,we protect them and keep them safe etc etc etc what more do they want from us hey! and all we ask for is a little ,just a little respect , she will eventually realise but it will only be when she has her kids ..Wait untill her GCSE's start got them at the moment and i'll tell you my one would argue with the brick wall if she could she 's under so much pressure , Take care x

[curlyperm]

lol mysteryt god i am sooooo looking forward to her gcse's now : ( i had not even thought about those!! heheheh

[MYSTERYT]

Hi curlyperm
My answer would be to have selective hearing ,(like they do lol) i do and it really annoys her,my one just asked me if she can pierce her nose, belly button ,and another one in her ear ,even though she already has 2 in one ear and 3 in the other, i laughed ,asked her if she related to Mrs Watering-can,Kids hey!!!!, If all else fails well get the Vodka out and mines a double .x

[curlyperm]

well we just got back from a lovely day at the Trafford Centre (as you do on a WET bank holiday...............nightmare) but on a trip that is usually littered with rows and shouting and falling out, we had a lovely day!!! mind you she was shopping for clothes, with 3 weeks wages saved up, Hmmmmm strange how reluctant they are to spend their OWN money on certain items, like bras etc,, apparently i'm supposed to buy that sort of thing? right well i'm knackered so large white wine coming up and large vodka for you...........i'll leave it on the table for ya x