return to work

[spanner7853]

I know you'll think I am silly but I am due to return to work after maternity leave in May and I am having a really bad time at the thought of leaving my little boy in a nursery. I have no option but to return to work as my husband doesn't earn that much money but I don't know what to do.

My job has gonewith everyone elses in my department and I have got to go for promotion while I am off as my grade no longer exists. I have been able to enjoy my maternity leave at the thought of not just going back to work but having to go for interviews while I'm off and not even knowing what job I am going back to. Please help. x

[Ice.Maiden]

Sorry girls, but I can't be the only one who thinks beck might have a point. It's all too common these days for mums to have their babies and then palm them off into nurseries or with childminders. Before you all rant & rave, I appreciate that returning to work might not be a choice for some women, but for others it IS. How can a person possibly give "quality time" to their offspring, when they probably only see them for a couple of hours each evening? I know what it costs to keep a child in nursery for 5 days a week, so if parents can afford that, I think they can afford to stay at home. It just seems that living beyond our means has become a way of life - at the expense of our children. Which is better - a huge mortgage, new car and not seeing your children, or settling for less and being there for them?

[CHOPSUEY]

It may be a small mortgage, old banger and nursery for 2-3 days? We all have different views on how to do things, but becks07 is out of order for her aggressive approach to a simple enquiry, and I bet her money didn't come through honest graft.

[spanner7853]

thank you to all you lovely people who have supported me on this one. I will ignore the mad ranting woman who obviously sponges off her husband while he workd his fingers to the bone supporting her!!! She knows nothing about my circumstances but those who know me and know what situation I have i.e not being able to spend time at home though I would dearly love to will appreciate what I am going through. Big hugs to you nice people out there. xxxxxxxxxxxx

[mrs_overall]

Beck is a foul mouthed THIEF who was sacked from her job at M&S.
What a shining example of motherhood she is. Not.

Spanner - I can't add to the good advice the decent people have given you, but I wish you luck.

[beck07]

To all of you that think your big to have a go- you can all go f*** yourselfs 4 al i care!! i run my own buisness from home and my baby has absoloutly everything he wants and so do i!!
and so f****g what ive made some mistakes- which by the way- none of you know the full story about!!! Ice-Maiden is the only one who agrees with me because the rest of you are stuck up losers who need to work 50 hours a week like idiots to pay your f****g bills!!! IS IT REALLY WORTH IT??
your all moaning at me for being this and being that, but im obviosuly a bit more clued up then the rest of you as im running my own buisness and looking after my baby as well, whilst your all busting your asses and living misserably!!!
So stick that up ur asses!!!
As for any1 that agree's with me- im glad u can see my point, anyone that doesnt can go back to your boring lives for al i f****g care!!!!

[beck07]

OH AND AS FOR YOU MISS_OVERAL- you should watch your mouth if you dont know the whole truth!!!
obviously you would be on here having a go at me because you dont have anything better to do than jump to conclusions about things you know f*** all about!!
You shrivled old cow!

[aims1202]

I agree with ice maiden and some of what beck07 says, but i think beck07 has been out of order on this thread and has because of that no one wants to listen to her. beck07-why did you have to be rude to people, why couldnt you just give your views in an adult way?
I actually think it is much better for one parent to stay at home with their children when they are young. I do think that a lot ( and i'm not saying all) of people in this country do have a choice to stay at home or put their child into childcare and go to work. They might say they need to pay the mortgage etc but do they really need a house that big/expensive? or two cars and other material things? I think a lot of people want a certain lifestyle and would rather keep this up and put their child into a nursery then have less and stay at home.
I understand there are a few who would struggle if they did not work, and usually they would qualify for extra help. If there is no option but to work i think working from home is always an option. I also understand that some mums feel they want to work because they are isolated or 'just a mum' and nothing else. This is our society and the attitudes towards being a stay at home mum. It is the most important job in the world and that should be recognised more. There are some around but there should be more places for parents and kids to go to, to meet others to experience new things together and to not be isolated. Money should be put into this and not into trying to get parents back to work. Lets help parents feel valued and important if they want to stay at home and give their children the best start in life with time and love.
continued

[aims1202]

I also think that choosing to put a child under the age of 2.5yrs into a nursery is definitely not a good thing. I have personal experience of working in day nurseries with babies and toddlers. Believe me you parents do not see the whole picture, they are not good places for babies. They need one to one and so if you really want to put them into childcare, i would say consider a nanny or nanny share or a childminder. If you have a good one your child will be much better off than in a nursery.

[beck07]

aims1202- I have only been rude because i gave my views and got attitude back for it!
I understand that people have to work, but i dont see why people plan a baby then stick them in daycare!
Like you said, they are not good places for babies and young children and i couldnt imagine being away from my baby for all them hours a day- u would miss so much!!
My opinion of this subject is if your going plan a baby, then you should make sure you can afford to stay at home with them, maybe im the only one that thinks like that but thats what i think!
I think it got very out of hand becasue everyone agress with me and doesn't want to admit it so they just argue againts it!

[gem_35]

followed the links about beck 07. ha ha what a loser. and she thinks she can judge this lady that started this thread because she is goin back to work. i cant believe it!!! beck07 = ****!

[beck07]

gem_35 so f****g what i got sacked! it was like 4 years ago get over it you stupid moron!!
Clearly you lacking some sort of attention at home so you start an argument to get some attention on here!!
your a sad pric*, why dont you f** of and grow up!

[gem_35]

beck 07 how old are you???

[beck07]

like thats got anything to do with you!!

[tigwig]

well you can't really talk about that can you beck07? Wasn't it you who started this argument? Pot kettle black!

[beck07]

no it wasnt, it was these bored sad little old ladies who have nothing better to do!

[meglet]

Beck07 runs her own business? Dealing in stolen counterfeit clothes judging by her previous posts. Yes, you should follow her example!

[tigwig]

well you did get nasty first but it is fun to wind people up isn't it? Not that I agree with you doing this to spanner because I know myself how difficult it is to go back to work and I only work 2 days and my mum has my daughter.
Anyway if you really want to wind people up try criminal law (I think) it is about this guy who asks for help on a section18 after he's stabbed someone I have been winding him up something rotten! (yes I am bored but not old!)

[beck07]

tigwig- i really am not on here to wind her up i just dont agree with what she's doing! I think all the others are very bored and moody and just like to type lol!!
But im gonna have a look at this guy your winding up as it sounds quite funny! ;)

[aims1202]

beck07 - yes you did but it still doesnt mean you have to be rude. if someone gives me a nasty reply then i just answer with my views in an adult way, theres no point getting angry and being rude because then they dont listen to your argument.
So does anyone else agree with me and ice maiden?

[beck07]

Do you think your my mum or someting??
No1 on here is going to agree with you- good luck finding someone who does!! They all believe its ok to dump their children in daycare!!
Anyway im far too bored and far too grown up to be arguing with my computer screen i will leave you all to it!!