Should I wake him?

[Velvetee]

My partner took the little one out to see his relatives at about 5pm, he returned at 6.30 and baby was asleep, he's still asleep now and well due a feed and change. Should I wake him or wait until he wakes up?

[annie0000]

To me this comes across as not what was said, but how the tone could be interpreted.

Whilst the advise supplied was fine, the tone to me sounded patronising and I am not a stressed, sleep deprived new mother.

[ZacDingleggy]

DO you know how to get back to chatterbank?

If you do then maybe ill tell you what i really think of that?


Yes jack that was as helpful as all of your posts on here , possibly even more helpful than usual.


AND IM STILL 100% CORRECT BECAUSE


my first answer was.

ZacDingleggy
Sun 12/07/09
22:40 theres no need to wake him.

If youre unsure of taking care of your baby id advise you to speak to your health visitor about this and any other parenting issues /dilemmas you may have.

Asking on a website isnt the best idea.

Anything else i posted was after my asnwer so is not and cannot be a correction of the said answer.

?�?� DID THAT HELP ?�?

[Lore]

Hi Velvetee, I haven't read through all the replies due to the amount of twoddle... Sorry if anyone has already given you the advice you needed.

Yes, feed and change your little one. You'll probably be able to do it whilst he sleeps at such a young age. He does need to be fed on a regular basis, regardless of his sleeping patterns As for changing his nappy, I'd suggest that you change after every feed (whether he needs it or not), just so that his little botty gets a bit of an airing and a clean to save any rashes developing. Obviously, also change if it's feeling a bit heavy!!

Hope everything's going well for you and your little family. :) x

[Velvetee]

The point is Pasta, as a new mother, I don't need this insensitive ass suggesting my parenting skills are rubbish. It's hard enough being a new mother without some jerk making comments to suggest I don't know what I'm doing or don't know how to care for my baby. How dare he, this tw@t doesn't even know me.

I do NOT value the opinion of such people who come here to demean and make others feel bad, so Pasta, back your mate up all you like, I don't give a sh*t. I'm sick of all the nasty bstards on here who just make malicious comments. So you too can go to hell too.

[ZacDingleggy]

Annie i object to your incinuation.

I stand by my advice and have yet to read any better advice as of yet on the thread .

Im also confident my advice will be taken and the health visitor will be consulted and will put velvetee at ease over all and any worries she may have.

Irrespective of other users opinions of what they thought i meant , i however know exactly what i meant.

[Ice.Maiden]

In general, you don't need to wake your baby for a feed. He'll let you know when he's hungry - unless he's poorly. The nappy changing is a different matter. It's quite OK to change a sleeping baby, otherwise they can get nappy rash, which can be very unpleasant for a little one.
Use your natural feelings as a mum. Only you know your baby, but talking to your health visitor will put your mind at rest, whether they have children of their own or not. A trained HV will have come across all sorts of problems like this, and be able advise what's best for you and your little one.
Finally Velvetee, although I hope that things turn out well for you, your reply was extremely rude to someone who was offering advice. The advice wasn't wrong, although new mums DO have access to a hospital/midwife helpline 24/7. I sincerely hope that your language isn't in every-day use.

[Lore]

Velvette, have you had a look at the bounty website? it's a forum for pregnancy and then each milestone & Q&A's after your baby arrives.. there are masses of women all with the same questions and also, masses of women who have had children and are able to offer advice. It's a fast paced site so you should get your answers within minutes.
I've used it with my babies and still use it now. (Lore07)

[dot.haukes]

It was ages before i felt i was coping wioth my first born velvetee, everything was so crazy with the inlaws descending on the quarter when he was 2 weeks old and my late MIL taking over the place and trying to tell me how to do things, it was a nightmare, those 2 weeks were 2 weeks i tried to blot out of my life.
As I say, it wasn't easy with a new baby so far from home and not a clue really, it took along time to get into a toutine and recognise his cries and what they meant. I am not sure at what point i finally felt I was able to cope with him, but i think it was about last Friday and he is 28 next month.
if you need any help or advice on looking after your new born i am rubbish and so won;t be any good but if you want a natter just post a thread and i'll join in!!

[annie0000]

Leggy - I haven't insinuated anything - I worded my post very carefully - I said "to me", to yourself and others it may not come across as patronising, but to me and maybe others it did. I don't know quite how that "insinuates" anything.

[ZacDingleggy]

Velvetee i think youd bebetter to log off and relax.Youre being irrational and now even insulting pasta.
I didnt say you didnt know , you were however asking for advice on something .Everything else is merely assumptions on your part.

And theres no need for the insults you are being irrational and wont be doing yourself any good thru this sort of overreaction.

[dustinmyeye]

im sorry velvetee i know you may be a new stressed mother but you are downright rude. noone suggested that you didnt know what you were doing,in fact the only insulting i see on this whole thread is coming from yourself. do yourself a favour and log off answerbank as you are getting yourself riled up here for no reason.

[ZacDingleggy]

To me this comes across as not what was said, but how the tone could be interpreted.


, the tone to me sounded patronising


that says it all annie

and i think you were being a bit unkind referring to velvetee as" a stressed, sleep deprived new mother."


But maybe im reading the tone wrong as well ?

[ZacDingleggy]

I don't know quite how that "insinuates" anything.


And as for that annie if thats not patronising then nothing is.
I find your posts to and about me to be both patronising , judgemental , opinionated , and totally wrong.

However your opinion on this doesnt detract from the fact i gave honest sound advice that will be acted on so my conscience is clear.

[jackthehat]

And he gets really quite anxious if anyone dares to contradict him.........feverish, even.

Don't worry, Velvetee. The mists of new motherhood will eventually clear and you'll be able to see your path through clearly enough.

Best of luck.

[annie0000]

Wrong again leggy - I didn't say that Velvetee was a stressed and sleep deprived mother, I said I wasn't.

I don't see what repeating back to me what I said achieves, I know what I said.

I expressed my personal opinion on how things appeared to me - others are welcome to agree or disagree - quite apparantly you have chosen the latter.

Quite often when we type, we have our own tone in mind, that is not always how the written word comes out - I am reasonably sure that had you been speaking, your tone would not necessarily have been patronising and if you weren't trying to help, you surely wouldn't have bothered to post.

I have already said that your advice itself was fine. I was offering a possible explanation and/or some constructive critisism regarding the reaction that it received.

It is your perogative as to whether you chose to agree or not or take it on board.

Other than that, I couldn't give a toss and am going to bed.

[MWB]

This is incredible!

This is a serious question in a serious topic.

Velvetee, just take advice on what you like, or ignore what you don't like. There's no need for anyone to slang off the other for their views.

I posted an answer earlier & I don't even have children.

[ZacDingleggy]

Annie what i said has now been made irrelevant by the fact velvetee has now dragged this into an arguement in chatterbank
" I've come to a decision. I'm sick of this site and the hundreds of A-Holes on here, who obviously only use the site to demean and abuse others. I'm sick of the handful of bullies and their daft minions. who will always back their masters up, regardless of the situation."


So if ive taken waht you said the wrong way then ill gladly apologise annie.But i dont think what i said has anything to do with velvetees reaction , i think its merely an overeaction on her part and an attempt to get me to throw back abuse at her , which im not interested in.I was trying to give an honest opinion and if the tone seemed wrong then that wasnt intentional but the advice is solid and i stand by it.

I certainly wont be stuoid enough to get drawn into the arguement thread , hopefully it will be removed as its onlky intention is to cause trouble.

Well im not being a party to it.

On that point ill leave the thread , good evening to all the ladies here and gents if there are any.